There is a big bowl of candy staring me in the face. It is there because all of the trick-or-treaters decided to go as "invisible," so I couldn't find them to give them candy.
Daisy seems to have been feeling a little funny today. She puked on the rug and on the couch. She also hasn't pooped or peed nearly as much as is normal for her.
I could have sworn there were a bunch of things I had to say, but now that I'm here writing, they have completely slipped my mind.
Camouflage Taz.
I dressed up as Martha Stewart for Reformation Day. I baked a pound cake and made chili. I even made an orange glaze (from scratch, using a freshly squeezed orange) for the cake.
I really wish kids had come and taken this candy. I got a bag of sour Skittles, and when I eat them the sour coating chews up the roof of my mouth. It's terrible. But these pretty green bags keep staring at me.
I'm sure there was something from yesterday that I wanted to talk about. I'm driving myself crazy trying to recall it.
This chili is starting to hit me pretty low in the gut.
The Broncos are going to lose tomorrow. They just aren't a good team. 6-0 is meaningless. They suck. The Ravens will destroy them.
People who read this blog: Person from the Phillipines who wanted to know how to "donate to the Salvation Army"
Apparently, the Salvation Army exists in the Phillipines. Well this weirdo wants to be all generous and junk and donate stuff. What a loser. Only losers do things like that. I mean come on. Seriously. Who does that? I didn't know people in the Phillipines even had stuff to donate. Maybe this person was looking to get stuff from the Salvation Army. Well, whatever the case, they ended up here, reading about how Jerry and Nancy aren't very nice Majors. I hope that shows donation person, and they decide not to donate. The last thing this world needs is more charity.
Saturday, October 31, 2009
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Deathly Thoughts
I hadn't seen Bobbie all week. As you maybe have gathered from this blog, she is a frequent visitor while I am in the office. The fact that I hadn't seen her from last week really started to worry me today. I couldn't help but worry that she was dead. She doesn't have any family visiting her. How would I know that she had passed? It occupied my thoughts the entire time I was in the office. I didn't want to have to deal with a dead person in my building. I don't know who to call. I don't want to have to notify some distant relative. So perhaps you will understand how grateful I was when there was a knock on the door this afternoon and it turned out to be Bobbie to tell me that the mailman couldn't get the mail-boxes shut.
Daisy definitely has designated her favorite pooping region. It just happens to be right in front of Pat's patio. I feel bad. I imagine pat sitting in her apartment, watching Daisy poop day after day. I hope she doesn't take it as a personal insult.
Speaking of Pat. Not long after Bobbie came by, someone buzzed are apartment. I answered, and it was Pat with what sounded like another woman. Pat started by asking if my wife's name was Nancy. I explained that Nancy was one of the Majors next deoor. I learned that this lady had come to donate coats to the Salvation Army and confused the apartments with the Salvation Army itself. The ladies quickly forgot they had buzzed me, and I listened in a bit as I found out that Pat doesn't like the new Majors. In fact, she imformed this lady that the Majors weren't very friendly at all. I just thought this was interesting.
Anna's grandmother gets mad if she sees that our car is at the apartments when she is over at the Salvation Army. Naturally, we can't tell her that she is an evil old lady, which means that we try to make sure we aren't around the apartments when she is around. Today being Thursday means that she was over there for the dinner. We didn't manage to leave before she arrived, but we were sure gone before she was done. We used it as an excuse to run up to Greenwood and Qdoba Thursday (we missed our Qdoba Thursday friends).
Light blue with black horizontal stripes.
Normally, I would be watching the World Series. I can't this year. I'm too depressed.
People who read this blog: Person who searched "neck hurts when rainy"
This person is from North Carolina. This person is most assuredly female. A man would say "neck hurts when raining." This person is probably not on Death's doorstep. Though, she is probably now terrified that she is after learning the fate of the two people whose shoulders hurt when they move their neck. This lady is probably old because old people always seem to have weather related pains. It's probably an old war would, acquired in a knife fight with a former lover. This means that this person is a southern belle with a violent past. She was probably once Miss North Carolina and was probably disqualified for trying to murder her competitors. Her past career as a beauty queen also guarantees she has a tenuous grip on reality and likely thinks that the terrorists are from one of them places like that there Antarctica or something. Our violent former pageanteer likes to spend her time getting into bar brawls and doing her hair. Honestly, I'm shocked she had enough brain cells bumping together to allow her to even think to search the internet for answers to her neck pain.
Daisy definitely has designated her favorite pooping region. It just happens to be right in front of Pat's patio. I feel bad. I imagine pat sitting in her apartment, watching Daisy poop day after day. I hope she doesn't take it as a personal insult.
Speaking of Pat. Not long after Bobbie came by, someone buzzed are apartment. I answered, and it was Pat with what sounded like another woman. Pat started by asking if my wife's name was Nancy. I explained that Nancy was one of the Majors next deoor. I learned that this lady had come to donate coats to the Salvation Army and confused the apartments with the Salvation Army itself. The ladies quickly forgot they had buzzed me, and I listened in a bit as I found out that Pat doesn't like the new Majors. In fact, she imformed this lady that the Majors weren't very friendly at all. I just thought this was interesting.
Anna's grandmother gets mad if she sees that our car is at the apartments when she is over at the Salvation Army. Naturally, we can't tell her that she is an evil old lady, which means that we try to make sure we aren't around the apartments when she is around. Today being Thursday means that she was over there for the dinner. We didn't manage to leave before she arrived, but we were sure gone before she was done. We used it as an excuse to run up to Greenwood and Qdoba Thursday (we missed our Qdoba Thursday friends).
Light blue with black horizontal stripes.
Normally, I would be watching the World Series. I can't this year. I'm too depressed.
People who read this blog: Person who searched "neck hurts when rainy"
This person is from North Carolina. This person is most assuredly female. A man would say "neck hurts when raining." This person is probably not on Death's doorstep. Though, she is probably now terrified that she is after learning the fate of the two people whose shoulders hurt when they move their neck. This lady is probably old because old people always seem to have weather related pains. It's probably an old war would, acquired in a knife fight with a former lover. This means that this person is a southern belle with a violent past. She was probably once Miss North Carolina and was probably disqualified for trying to murder her competitors. Her past career as a beauty queen also guarantees she has a tenuous grip on reality and likely thinks that the terrorists are from one of them places like that there Antarctica or something. Our violent former pageanteer likes to spend her time getting into bar brawls and doing her hair. Honestly, I'm shocked she had enough brain cells bumping together to allow her to even think to search the internet for answers to her neck pain.
Pee
We took Daisy to get destinkified today. She peed on the groomer person. She doesn't stink though. Now she smells like strawberries.
Daulton got his report card. He got grades for three classes: social studies, health, and math. Apparently, these are the important subjects for juvenile delinquents. He got "A"s in social studies and health. He got a "B" in math. I wasn't at all surprised to hear about his high marks in social studies, considering the things he has taught me about such oft misunderstood topics like slavery and country building.
In another example of how Daulton lacks normal interpersonal skills, Mildred's daughter came by to drop some stuff off in Mildred's apartment. On her way out and without even saying anything to Daulton, he found it necessary to announce to her that he had gotten his report card, to tell her his grades, and to explain how he will be going back to normal school next semester. I just felt bad for the poor lady.
I keep belching the stinkiest belches.
The cats were out of cat food. I refilled their food dispenser. They are no longer bothering me.
It keeps raining. If it would stop raining, I would be able to set up a tree stand and start hunting.
We went to Chelsey's choirs' concert this evening. They sang songs like "Smoke on the Water" and "Barracuda." The kids seemed to enjoy themselves.
I won't take a shower tonight.
It's okay, though. I took a shower before we went to the concert.
I got a cast iron skillet tonight. I'm excited. It will make a deadly weapon.
People who read this blog: Yet another person who was googling about shoulder pain connected to neck movement.
As you are aware from the previous post, this person is probably already dead. Just like the other already dead person, God brought this person to my blog in order to get a glimpse of the Heavenly Realms before he or she passed on. In this instance though, this person unfortunately had to learn of his or her imminent demise from my writings. This surely induced a state of panic, in which he or she likely attempted to do everything he or she had always wanted to do. I am sure that tomorrow we will start hearing on the news about how a crazed dying maniac murdered various people who had been mean, ate all sorts of delicious food, kissed a bunch of people he or she had always had a crush on, and then keeled over dead from the dreaded shoulder-hurts-when-neck-moves disease. The Lord, in his infinite wisdom, must have seen fit for this catastrophe to happen. I suppose we will never know for sure why, but I suspect that perhaps the actions inspired by the knowledge dispensed in this blog will somehow save an even bigger disaster. Perhaps one of the people, who was a meany and was as a result murdered by our dying friend, would have been the driver of a car that would kick up a rock, and that rock would fly into the eye of a motorcyclist, who would then wreck into an onlooking deer, which in turn would run off, mortally wounded and expire in the woods near a stream, where it would rot and a new kind of super bacteria would mutate on the corpse, slip into the water supply and eventually poison the entire U.S. population of parakeets. The knowledge that this blog has prevented such a calamity does my heart good.
Daulton got his report card. He got grades for three classes: social studies, health, and math. Apparently, these are the important subjects for juvenile delinquents. He got "A"s in social studies and health. He got a "B" in math. I wasn't at all surprised to hear about his high marks in social studies, considering the things he has taught me about such oft misunderstood topics like slavery and country building.
In another example of how Daulton lacks normal interpersonal skills, Mildred's daughter came by to drop some stuff off in Mildred's apartment. On her way out and without even saying anything to Daulton, he found it necessary to announce to her that he had gotten his report card, to tell her his grades, and to explain how he will be going back to normal school next semester. I just felt bad for the poor lady.
I keep belching the stinkiest belches.
The cats were out of cat food. I refilled their food dispenser. They are no longer bothering me.
It keeps raining. If it would stop raining, I would be able to set up a tree stand and start hunting.
We went to Chelsey's choirs' concert this evening. They sang songs like "Smoke on the Water" and "Barracuda." The kids seemed to enjoy themselves.
I won't take a shower tonight.
It's okay, though. I took a shower before we went to the concert.
I got a cast iron skillet tonight. I'm excited. It will make a deadly weapon.
People who read this blog: Yet another person who was googling about shoulder pain connected to neck movement.
As you are aware from the previous post, this person is probably already dead. Just like the other already dead person, God brought this person to my blog in order to get a glimpse of the Heavenly Realms before he or she passed on. In this instance though, this person unfortunately had to learn of his or her imminent demise from my writings. This surely induced a state of panic, in which he or she likely attempted to do everything he or she had always wanted to do. I am sure that tomorrow we will start hearing on the news about how a crazed dying maniac murdered various people who had been mean, ate all sorts of delicious food, kissed a bunch of people he or she had always had a crush on, and then keeled over dead from the dreaded shoulder-hurts-when-neck-moves disease. The Lord, in his infinite wisdom, must have seen fit for this catastrophe to happen. I suppose we will never know for sure why, but I suspect that perhaps the actions inspired by the knowledge dispensed in this blog will somehow save an even bigger disaster. Perhaps one of the people, who was a meany and was as a result murdered by our dying friend, would have been the driver of a car that would kick up a rock, and that rock would fly into the eye of a motorcyclist, who would then wreck into an onlooking deer, which in turn would run off, mortally wounded and expire in the woods near a stream, where it would rot and a new kind of super bacteria would mutate on the corpse, slip into the water supply and eventually poison the entire U.S. population of parakeets. The knowledge that this blog has prevented such a calamity does my heart good.
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
And It's Raining Again
Daisy has a stinky butt. Anna has made her an appointment for tomorrow with the dog groomers to get her stinky butt unstinkified. Thinking about Daisy's stinky butt makes me nauseous, so I'm not going to talk about her anymore.
I lied. I have to talk about her more, because I have nothing else to talk about.
There is absolutely nothing interesting to say about my time in the office.
We gave Daisy a bath today.
She pooped a bunch.
We took her over to the in-laws.
She played with Hank all night.
Anna and her father de-seeded a bunch of persimmons.
Anna found a recipe for persimmon cookies. I followed the recipe. We had persimmon cookies. They were very pleasant.
Dark blue with light blue horizontal stripes.
Beulah came by yesterday with a paint by numbers model horse. She wanted Daulton to have it. Surprisingly enough, Daulton was really excited about it. He came in today and told me he had actually gone ahead and painted it last night.
The top of my head itches.
Anna's friend Chelsey teaches middle school choir. Her kids have their first concert tomorrow. I think we're going.
Daisy fell into the goldfish pond, at the in-laws, this evening.
Well, I don't have much to say this evening.
I hate that the NBA is starting up again. ESPN is so much better when they are only talking baseball and football.
People who read this blog: Person googling "shoulder hurts when I move my neck"
This person is clearly dying. There is no other explanation for the connection between his neck movement and his shoulder pain. In fact, he is probably dead by now. The last thing he saw on this green earth was our blog, and then God decided to take him home. The poor sucker didn't stand a chance. Everyone knows that when you move your neck and your shoulder hurts, you are doomed. Poor fellow was guided to our blog in his final hours, by the very hand of God. The wisdom imparted through these words was surely enough to comfortably carry him on to the other side. He probably still faithfully follows this blog from the sweet hereafter. Heck, I'll bet God has made this blog required reading for all of his Heavenly Host. Shoulder pain person was truly blessed by God to have such a pure glimpse of the Heavenly realm in his dying mind.
I lied. I have to talk about her more, because I have nothing else to talk about.
There is absolutely nothing interesting to say about my time in the office.
We gave Daisy a bath today.
She pooped a bunch.
We took her over to the in-laws.
She played with Hank all night.
Anna and her father de-seeded a bunch of persimmons.
Anna found a recipe for persimmon cookies. I followed the recipe. We had persimmon cookies. They were very pleasant.
Dark blue with light blue horizontal stripes.
Beulah came by yesterday with a paint by numbers model horse. She wanted Daulton to have it. Surprisingly enough, Daulton was really excited about it. He came in today and told me he had actually gone ahead and painted it last night.
The top of my head itches.
Anna's friend Chelsey teaches middle school choir. Her kids have their first concert tomorrow. I think we're going.
Daisy fell into the goldfish pond, at the in-laws, this evening.
Well, I don't have much to say this evening.
I hate that the NBA is starting up again. ESPN is so much better when they are only talking baseball and football.
People who read this blog: Person googling "shoulder hurts when I move my neck"
This person is clearly dying. There is no other explanation for the connection between his neck movement and his shoulder pain. In fact, he is probably dead by now. The last thing he saw on this green earth was our blog, and then God decided to take him home. The poor sucker didn't stand a chance. Everyone knows that when you move your neck and your shoulder hurts, you are doomed. Poor fellow was guided to our blog in his final hours, by the very hand of God. The wisdom imparted through these words was surely enough to comfortably carry him on to the other side. He probably still faithfully follows this blog from the sweet hereafter. Heck, I'll bet God has made this blog required reading for all of his Heavenly Host. Shoulder pain person was truly blessed by God to have such a pure glimpse of the Heavenly realm in his dying mind.
Sunday, October 25, 2009
Bye-Weeks Are The Worst
Yesterday, the former associate pastor from Anna's old church got married. So we went to the wedding. It was nice enough. I just have to say this though: I am extremely spoiled by Anna and her music major friends. I'm around good music all the time. This makes it hard for me to judge between mediocre music and the truly bad, but this was overall the worst wedding singing I've ever heard.
There were camels standing in the parking lot of the church. That was kind of interesting. Apparently, the bride likes camels.
After the wedding, we went over to the in-laws' place and had dinner. Sarah even showed up with a home made apple pie.
There was about an hour gap between when we got back to the house and when Sarah was supposed to show up. Anna's father decided to use that time to run in to Lowe's for some lumber. He took me along. This is always a chilling prospect. Whenever the father of my wife wants to go somewhere alone with me I fear for my life, or at the very least, I fear I'm about to get a good talking to. Fortunately, I'm still alive to write about this, and he didn't even seem to have a bone to pick with me. I guess he just likes having a guy around sometimes.
Dinner was fine. We had fried chicken and mashed potatoes. Or at least, that is what I had. The rest of them ate this broccoli/cauliflower salad. Blech. We finished dinner with Sarah's apple pie. She did a nice job.
After dinner, Anna's father climbed into their persimmon tree and shook down the persimmons, for Anna, Sarah, and I to pick up. Anna found some interesting looking recipes for persimmons, and I guess we'll put those to the test this week. Persimmons kind of scare me though. They look like rotten tomatoes, and the ripe ones explode when they fall to the ground.
Sarah decided she wanted to be Minnie Mouse for Halloween, so Anna helped her make some ears for her costume. Sarah even has a polka-dot dress for the occasion. Apparently, when she saw it in the store she couldn't help buying it, reasoning, "why would anyone ever buy this hideous thing?"
Anna's cousins, Scott and Rachel, really wanted to get together with us last night. At first, they talked about going to a haunted house but eschewed that idea in favor of renting a movie. Rachel rented "The Last House on the Left." Honestly, it wasn't really as awful a movie as I suspected, though that is probably more due to Rachel's own personal movie preferences than anything this one had to offer. It was more of a thriller than a horror movie, which made it especially funny to watch Rachel's reactions. She kept jumping and squealing at moments that weren't even designed to be that horrifying. I reminded her that this wasn't even that kind of movie. I think we did all at least enjoy the final demise of the antagonist, however unrealistic it may have been (let's just say it involved a microwave).
Today, we really didn't do much. I took Daisy out to use the bathroom a couple times. We watched enough of the Colts game to know that the rest would just be more of the same. The Broncos have a bye this week, making this the worst week of the football season. We slept a little. Dishes and clothes got washed. Leftovers got eaten.
Dark blue.
People who read this blog: Person from India.
Person from India could be India. India is huge. And it is pointy. India produced Gandhi, perhaps the most overrated human being ever. India person, you are solely responsible for the American Indians being known as Indians. It is all your fault that North America stood in the way of Columbus and his spice route dreams. India person, your country is famous for spicy food, but I dare you to come to the U.S. and eat any number of the different "nuclear," "blazin'," or "atomic" hot wings this great land has to offer. I dare you to swallow a cap-full of Dave's Hot Sauce and not break a sweat. I challenge you my India person friend. Bring it. Pray to any of your millions of gods to save you from the wrath of the buffalo wing. Be grateful too, that it is a chicken wing and not some sort of beef dish, you beef worshipping pansy. (Is this getting offensive? Should I stop? Probably)
There were camels standing in the parking lot of the church. That was kind of interesting. Apparently, the bride likes camels.
After the wedding, we went over to the in-laws' place and had dinner. Sarah even showed up with a home made apple pie.
There was about an hour gap between when we got back to the house and when Sarah was supposed to show up. Anna's father decided to use that time to run in to Lowe's for some lumber. He took me along. This is always a chilling prospect. Whenever the father of my wife wants to go somewhere alone with me I fear for my life, or at the very least, I fear I'm about to get a good talking to. Fortunately, I'm still alive to write about this, and he didn't even seem to have a bone to pick with me. I guess he just likes having a guy around sometimes.
Dinner was fine. We had fried chicken and mashed potatoes. Or at least, that is what I had. The rest of them ate this broccoli/cauliflower salad. Blech. We finished dinner with Sarah's apple pie. She did a nice job.
After dinner, Anna's father climbed into their persimmon tree and shook down the persimmons, for Anna, Sarah, and I to pick up. Anna found some interesting looking recipes for persimmons, and I guess we'll put those to the test this week. Persimmons kind of scare me though. They look like rotten tomatoes, and the ripe ones explode when they fall to the ground.
Sarah decided she wanted to be Minnie Mouse for Halloween, so Anna helped her make some ears for her costume. Sarah even has a polka-dot dress for the occasion. Apparently, when she saw it in the store she couldn't help buying it, reasoning, "why would anyone ever buy this hideous thing?"
Anna's cousins, Scott and Rachel, really wanted to get together with us last night. At first, they talked about going to a haunted house but eschewed that idea in favor of renting a movie. Rachel rented "The Last House on the Left." Honestly, it wasn't really as awful a movie as I suspected, though that is probably more due to Rachel's own personal movie preferences than anything this one had to offer. It was more of a thriller than a horror movie, which made it especially funny to watch Rachel's reactions. She kept jumping and squealing at moments that weren't even designed to be that horrifying. I reminded her that this wasn't even that kind of movie. I think we did all at least enjoy the final demise of the antagonist, however unrealistic it may have been (let's just say it involved a microwave).
Today, we really didn't do much. I took Daisy out to use the bathroom a couple times. We watched enough of the Colts game to know that the rest would just be more of the same. The Broncos have a bye this week, making this the worst week of the football season. We slept a little. Dishes and clothes got washed. Leftovers got eaten.
Dark blue.
People who read this blog: Person from India.
Person from India could be India. India is huge. And it is pointy. India produced Gandhi, perhaps the most overrated human being ever. India person, you are solely responsible for the American Indians being known as Indians. It is all your fault that North America stood in the way of Columbus and his spice route dreams. India person, your country is famous for spicy food, but I dare you to come to the U.S. and eat any number of the different "nuclear," "blazin'," or "atomic" hot wings this great land has to offer. I dare you to swallow a cap-full of Dave's Hot Sauce and not break a sweat. I challenge you my India person friend. Bring it. Pray to any of your millions of gods to save you from the wrath of the buffalo wing. Be grateful too, that it is a chicken wing and not some sort of beef dish, you beef worshipping pansy. (Is this getting offensive? Should I stop? Probably)
Saturday, October 24, 2009
I Need to Pee Just a Little Bit, But Not Enough to Make Me Go Now
Daulton had a headache today.
I wore sexy Euro-style underwear today, but Anna didn't notice.
I had to call the electrician to fix a bedroom light fixture in Velma's apartment.
I was bored tonight, so I was checking out my Comcast "On Demand" options and decided to watch "Wanted." Stupid, stupid movie.
The right side of my head itches.
Now my left ear canal itches.
Now my right ear canal itches.
There is this wedding thing tomorrow. I don't want to go.
There's a haunted house tomorrow too. I don't really want to go to that either.
All I really want to do is get a chance to spend a little while focused on deer hunting. I think next week I will start doing a little hunting in the morning before I have to come back to the office. I guess the issue will be what I do if I shoot a deer. I guess I'll just have to deal with that little problem when it arises.
It would be so nice to be able to have a freezer full of venison again and not have to buy anymore red-meat for a year.
I'm wearing red shorts over my sexy boxer-briefs. The shorts allow me to concentrate on things besides my own sexiness.
The beard is making a reappearance. I need to get a haircut soon, or I'll look like a wild man.
Anna has been a little sick the past couple days. You should feel sorry for her. Not only is she sick but she's married to a sicko as well.
I keep forgetting to replenish the fridge with my supply of AriZona Pomegranate Green Tea. Why must my favorite beverages always be lukewarm? I lead a deprived life.
Daisy has been chewing on the recliner legs. Anna had me put hot sauce on them to deter that activity. I haven't seen her chew on them since. I don't know if she tried after I put the hot sauce on or if the smell was enough to halt her mastication.
I love death metal. Is there a more perfect form of musical expression? I posit that there is not.
This is not to say that I do not love other forms of metal. I also enjoy black metal, doom metal, gothic metal, symphonic metal, industrial metal, and metalcore.
I do not however love glam metal or hair metal or any other '80s iteration of the metal genre.
Ironically, I have two favorite bands, and neither of them can even remotely be described as death metal. Heck, one band isn't even really metal at all. It just goes to show how musically open-minded I really am.
You know what I don't really enjoy? The overuse of blast-beats. Sure, it sounded cool once. Now be creative.
Go listen to some metal. It'll do your heart good.
(Honestly, I'm just blabbing because I don't have much to say about today, and this post felt too short.)
People who read this blog: Person from Spain
Person from Spain is fortunate. They get to speak Spanish without incurring any negative stereotypes about education, gangster activity, work ethic, legal status, or number of offspring. Instead, Person from Spain just stabs giant bovine with sharp pokey instruments for the amusement of other people from Spain. Person from Spain, has in fact probably been gored by a bull several times. Heck, he likely enjoys it at this point. I bet he even does that crazy run with the bulls thing. Person from Spain also gets to enjoy the finest Ham in the world (or so I'm told). If Hemingway is any indication, Person from Spain spends all his time drinking wine from leather flasks and despises white men who pretend to be aficionados of bull fighting. Person from Spain is also fortunate to be able to speak a romantic language without it being French (everyone hates the French). Person from Spain probably cannot escape the ladies. He most assuredly found this blog in his attempts to learn how to be as great a love machine as I. Alas, I do not share my secrets with the world.
I wore sexy Euro-style underwear today, but Anna didn't notice.
I had to call the electrician to fix a bedroom light fixture in Velma's apartment.
I was bored tonight, so I was checking out my Comcast "On Demand" options and decided to watch "Wanted." Stupid, stupid movie.
The right side of my head itches.
Now my left ear canal itches.
Now my right ear canal itches.
There is this wedding thing tomorrow. I don't want to go.
There's a haunted house tomorrow too. I don't really want to go to that either.
All I really want to do is get a chance to spend a little while focused on deer hunting. I think next week I will start doing a little hunting in the morning before I have to come back to the office. I guess the issue will be what I do if I shoot a deer. I guess I'll just have to deal with that little problem when it arises.
It would be so nice to be able to have a freezer full of venison again and not have to buy anymore red-meat for a year.
I'm wearing red shorts over my sexy boxer-briefs. The shorts allow me to concentrate on things besides my own sexiness.
The beard is making a reappearance. I need to get a haircut soon, or I'll look like a wild man.
Anna has been a little sick the past couple days. You should feel sorry for her. Not only is she sick but she's married to a sicko as well.
I keep forgetting to replenish the fridge with my supply of AriZona Pomegranate Green Tea. Why must my favorite beverages always be lukewarm? I lead a deprived life.
Daisy has been chewing on the recliner legs. Anna had me put hot sauce on them to deter that activity. I haven't seen her chew on them since. I don't know if she tried after I put the hot sauce on or if the smell was enough to halt her mastication.
I love death metal. Is there a more perfect form of musical expression? I posit that there is not.
This is not to say that I do not love other forms of metal. I also enjoy black metal, doom metal, gothic metal, symphonic metal, industrial metal, and metalcore.
I do not however love glam metal or hair metal or any other '80s iteration of the metal genre.
Ironically, I have two favorite bands, and neither of them can even remotely be described as death metal. Heck, one band isn't even really metal at all. It just goes to show how musically open-minded I really am.
You know what I don't really enjoy? The overuse of blast-beats. Sure, it sounded cool once. Now be creative.
Go listen to some metal. It'll do your heart good.
(Honestly, I'm just blabbing because I don't have much to say about today, and this post felt too short.)
People who read this blog: Person from Spain
Person from Spain is fortunate. They get to speak Spanish without incurring any negative stereotypes about education, gangster activity, work ethic, legal status, or number of offspring. Instead, Person from Spain just stabs giant bovine with sharp pokey instruments for the amusement of other people from Spain. Person from Spain, has in fact probably been gored by a bull several times. Heck, he likely enjoys it at this point. I bet he even does that crazy run with the bulls thing. Person from Spain also gets to enjoy the finest Ham in the world (or so I'm told). If Hemingway is any indication, Person from Spain spends all his time drinking wine from leather flasks and despises white men who pretend to be aficionados of bull fighting. Person from Spain is also fortunate to be able to speak a romantic language without it being French (everyone hates the French). Person from Spain probably cannot escape the ladies. He most assuredly found this blog in his attempts to learn how to be as great a love machine as I. Alas, I do not share my secrets with the world.
Friday, October 23, 2009
Pool Covers
Nothing all that interesting has gone on since the cigarette in a wastebasket incident. Daulton did manage to finish his 750 piece puzzle. As it turns out, there were only 748 pieces. He's now working on a 500 piece one. Perhaps this one will be all there.
Anna's cousin Scott has really been wanting to hang with us recently. He seems to be bored out of his mind and wants some company. He's been pestering us for the past week to do something, so we told him we were going over to the in-laws' (his aunt and uncle's) place tonight, should he want to join us. While on the way, we got a call saying that he could not in fact come because he had to go watch his mom play softball (you know, that sounds like the most depressing thing ever).
We took Daisy with us, so she could play with Hank and Lucy. Mostly, she just ends up playing with Hank. Lucy is too lazy to play much, though she still manages to lead Daisy astray. When Daisy is with Lucy, she absolutely refuses to listen to us when we call. Tonight, she disappeared into a cornfield for about ten minutes. Anna doesn't want to discipline her though. She just wants to love on her.
I got out my bow and made sure it was sighted in while we were there. The neighbor saw what he claims was a very nice buck on the in-laws' property, this very morning. These deer just taunt me. I'm hoping to have a stand up tomorrow night, and I'll start doing some serious hunting by Saturday.
Speaking of Saturday. There is a wedding that we have to go to on Saturday. This will be an awkward event. That's all.
Also speaking of Saturday. Anna's cousins want to go to a haunted house that night. I've never been to a haunted house. I suppose the idea has never really appealed to me. I'm not going to lie. I hate being startled.
Daisy is all tuckered out from playing with Hank.
After I shot, Anna's father enlisted us to help him cover up the pool for the winter. He really wanted it to get done tonight because it is supposed to storm, and he wanted to limit the quantity of leaves in the pool. While covering the pool, we were treated to Anna's mother telling us about whacking "peepies" and being unable to "sign de paperz because de fingerz are broken." I have no idea what inspired either of these things, but there you have it.
If I do manage to shoot a deer this year, I'm going to have to convince Anna to take a picture. That might be an issue. She hates blood.
Major League Baseball has finally acknowledge that the post-season umpiring has been horrendous. They've actually taken the step of changing the umpires that will officiate the World Series, due to the horrible calls that have been made by certain umps. Too bad they didn't realize they had hired idiots before the umpires screwed the Rockies over. I'm still 75% convinced the umpires are being paid under the table by MLB to encourage a Phillies-Yankees series. It might not even be MLB. It could be Fox. But at this point, there is no way that all these bad calls are just coincidence.
The Broncos still suck. I feel the need to point that out. 6-0 is still meaningless. Give me six more wins this year, and I might be willing to change my tune, at least a little. But until they win the Superbowl with Kyle Orton, trading Jay Cutler was an awful idea.
I do have to say that contrary to whatever certain deluded Raiders players might think, the Raiders are still about the worst team in football and have no hope of making the playoffs until Al Davis keels over dead.
My right ear itches.
People who read this blog: Person from Saudi Arabia
I suspect all sorts of terrible stereotypical things about my dear visitor from Saudi Arabia. I cannot prove any of them. But let me just say that I fear that my writings simply confirm everything negative the Arab world might believe about our country. This reader hates my freedom. He hates it bad. He cannot believe that I could ever be allowed to discuss my daily choice of underwear. He was most certainly scandalized by topics such as furrys and even the fact that I know the color of a woman's hair. I'm pretty sure I'm just giving the Middle East more reason to declare Jihad.
Anna's cousin Scott has really been wanting to hang with us recently. He seems to be bored out of his mind and wants some company. He's been pestering us for the past week to do something, so we told him we were going over to the in-laws' (his aunt and uncle's) place tonight, should he want to join us. While on the way, we got a call saying that he could not in fact come because he had to go watch his mom play softball (you know, that sounds like the most depressing thing ever).
We took Daisy with us, so she could play with Hank and Lucy. Mostly, she just ends up playing with Hank. Lucy is too lazy to play much, though she still manages to lead Daisy astray. When Daisy is with Lucy, she absolutely refuses to listen to us when we call. Tonight, she disappeared into a cornfield for about ten minutes. Anna doesn't want to discipline her though. She just wants to love on her.
I got out my bow and made sure it was sighted in while we were there. The neighbor saw what he claims was a very nice buck on the in-laws' property, this very morning. These deer just taunt me. I'm hoping to have a stand up tomorrow night, and I'll start doing some serious hunting by Saturday.
Speaking of Saturday. There is a wedding that we have to go to on Saturday. This will be an awkward event. That's all.
Also speaking of Saturday. Anna's cousins want to go to a haunted house that night. I've never been to a haunted house. I suppose the idea has never really appealed to me. I'm not going to lie. I hate being startled.
Daisy is all tuckered out from playing with Hank.
After I shot, Anna's father enlisted us to help him cover up the pool for the winter. He really wanted it to get done tonight because it is supposed to storm, and he wanted to limit the quantity of leaves in the pool. While covering the pool, we were treated to Anna's mother telling us about whacking "peepies" and being unable to "sign de paperz because de fingerz are broken." I have no idea what inspired either of these things, but there you have it.
If I do manage to shoot a deer this year, I'm going to have to convince Anna to take a picture. That might be an issue. She hates blood.
Major League Baseball has finally acknowledge that the post-season umpiring has been horrendous. They've actually taken the step of changing the umpires that will officiate the World Series, due to the horrible calls that have been made by certain umps. Too bad they didn't realize they had hired idiots before the umpires screwed the Rockies over. I'm still 75% convinced the umpires are being paid under the table by MLB to encourage a Phillies-Yankees series. It might not even be MLB. It could be Fox. But at this point, there is no way that all these bad calls are just coincidence.
The Broncos still suck. I feel the need to point that out. 6-0 is still meaningless. Give me six more wins this year, and I might be willing to change my tune, at least a little. But until they win the Superbowl with Kyle Orton, trading Jay Cutler was an awful idea.
I do have to say that contrary to whatever certain deluded Raiders players might think, the Raiders are still about the worst team in football and have no hope of making the playoffs until Al Davis keels over dead.
My right ear itches.
People who read this blog: Person from Saudi Arabia
I suspect all sorts of terrible stereotypical things about my dear visitor from Saudi Arabia. I cannot prove any of them. But let me just say that I fear that my writings simply confirm everything negative the Arab world might believe about our country. This reader hates my freedom. He hates it bad. He cannot believe that I could ever be allowed to discuss my daily choice of underwear. He was most certainly scandalized by topics such as furrys and even the fact that I know the color of a woman's hair. I'm pretty sure I'm just giving the Middle East more reason to declare Jihad.
Thursday, October 22, 2009
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Anna.
Here are a few pictures from the zoo. My favorite ones (by far) were of the kids we went with, but I feel super creepy posting pictures of other's children. So... I'm not gonna. For your viewing pleasure: some highlights.
Hehoff was happy to be there.
Sad picture.
It was also sad that this eagle was in there with a bunch of ravens and buzzards. Poor fellow.
This bear was awesome. And he kept poking his little fingernails into this tree. What was in there, Mr. Bear? Some tasty little critters?
And these ducks have really pretty heads. Sometimes they look green, sometimes they look blue. Cool idea, God. By the way, did you know the Indigo Bunting is actually a black bird? Look it up. Doesn't look like it, does it?
Yes, this is a cute little piggy. But what else do you notice? An empty case of beer? Why, yes! That's what that is. I think someone's been a bad little piggy.
I wish the cows in Indiana looked like this. That is all.
These goats were two of my favorites. Look closely at the face of the goat on the right. I love that guy's teeth!
These guys were lots of fun, too. Mostly I just like their loooong tails.
This elephant looks very sad. Sometimes the zoo makes me sad...
The end.
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
...And the Smoke Alarm Just Wouldn't Stop
My computer mouse doesn't want to roll to the left. My life is ruined.
I usually check the mail before I go to the office in the morning. In this mornings mail, I found an envelope from some strange place called "Hungary." I thought Anna should probably be warned that someone from this "Hungary" place was stalking us. Inside the envelope, there were a number of very lovely pictures of some very lovely people. These people even looked kind of familiar. Strange. It was a good start to the morning.
Then the morning got worse.
Bobbie was waiting in the Community Room when I got back to the office. She said she had something to talk to me about, but this of course wasn't as important as checking her mail. So while she did that, I pressed the "play" button on the answering machine. I had a message from Adult Protective Services. They wanted to talk to me about Beulah. They didn't say what it was concerning. They just wanted me to call back. Bobbie came in before I had a chance to call APS.
"Beulah called me this morning. She told me that Alice stole $15 from her." Well, at least that answered my question about why APS wanted to talk to me. Honestly, those first two sentences from Bobbie were all the information I really needed to hear from her. Instead, I was treated to a 45 minute speech about everything from Alice's no good kids and grandkids to Bobbie's desire to have the mortician remove her mustache when they prepared her body for viewing. Bobbie stayed on topic (i.e. Alice and Beulah) for about five minutes. The other forty minutes were all over the map. I heard more about her days working with victims of child molestation for the police department. I heard her prediction that she wouldn't be around very long. I heard how, when she dies, the city of Columbus will probably erect a statue in her honor for the charity work she has done: "Not to be bragging or anything."
Finally Bobbie left and right on queue, Beulah came in. According to Beulah, Alice had invited her over to her apartment, but while they were both there, Alice excused herself for awhile "to do laundry." When Beulah returned to her apartment, she discovered $15 missing. She admitted to me that she can't prove it, but she knows that Alice did it. I was treated to another fifteen minutes of far more focussed ranting. I got to hear all about how Alice's son Tony and her other family members don't work and how Alice would do anything for them. She seemed the most upset that she'd now how to lock her door whenever she wasn't in her apartment. I just let her talk it out, and when she left, I think she was at least satisfied that I knew the situation and that I couldn't do much about it.
During my conversation with Beulah, Daulton tried to come in and add his two cents about Alice's grandson's thieving ways, but I made him wait. When Beulah left, I explained to Daulton that I didn't want Beulah or anyone else knowing more than they already did about the situation. It would just make them more upset and angry and, it wouldn't lead to a resolution. I did, however, let Daulton tell me what he knew. According to Daulton, Alice's grandson proudly told him about robbing someone who owed him money. He told Daulton all about stealing an ipod and a gps and a cell phone as revenge. It doesn't surprise me. What frustrates me is the little I can do about it.
After I finally got all done talking to Bobbie and Beulah and Daulton, I managed to call the guy from APS back. He didn't answer. I left a message and provided him with my office hours. I never did get a call back. We'll see if he calls me tomorrow.
Nothing else too interesting happened while I was in the office today, but that doesn't mean my day stopped being interesting.
At about 4:30, I had taken Daisy outside, so she could relieve herself. While we were out there, I sound caught my attention. I realized I had been hearing it for at least a minute or two before it finally registered, and when it did register, I thought, "Uh oh." It was the unmistakeable sound of a smoke alarm. I headed a little closer to the building to see if I could tell where it was coming from and saw the buildings fire alarm lights flashing. It wasn't just someones smoke detector. It was the entire apartments alarm system that was going off. I hurried inside with Daisy and grabbed my keys. In the hallways, I found most of the residents looking around bewilderedly. Some were banging on other resident's doors to make sure they were alright. I saw no immediate sign of a fire, and the noise of the alarm made it impossible to think, so I first went to the office and reset the system. Once it was reset, I started exploring the building and asking residents if they had checked on the people that weren't in the hall. Several people started telling me they could smell smoke in the short wing of the building. I was about to head over there to investigate when the alarm started sounding again. I reset it again, and then headed towards what turned out to be a very smokey hallway. I could see all the residents from that wing except Katie, so I asked if anyone had checked on her. No one had and I was about to go myself when the alarm started sounding again. I reset it and then made my way to Katie's apartment. I learned from those ahead of me that Katie was indeed the source of all the smoke. Apparently, Katie and George had been sitting around smoking, and Katie had brilliantly decided that she should dispose of her cigarette in a wastebasket. Needless to say, this lead to a small, very smokey, fire. I checked on George and Katie myself to make sure that the fire was indeed out. The wastebasket ended up safely on her front porch. I then made sure Katie had her back door opened, to vent the smoke, and I had the hallway doors propped to air out the building. It still required two more trips to the office to reset the system, before all was quiet.
I wasn't back in my apartment long when I had a knock on the door. Mildred wanted to know how to open the screen on her storm doors. I wasn't too surprised at this request, since the screen rolls up very cleverly at the top of the door, but when I looked at her door, I was, for a minute, stumped myself. I finally gathered that her door, though it looked the same as the rest, had a different latch system for the screen. I showed her how it worked and returned to my apartment.
Fortunately, so far I haven't had to have any more dealings with residents since Mildred came calling.
I'm about to go to Wal-Mart.
My right nostrel itches.
Red (I think). I'm actually wearing other clothes, so it's hard for me to tell.
The Broncos are terrible. They will have no chance against real opponents. So far they have had one of the easiest schedules in the league. They are probably the worst 6-0 team ever. It saddens me to know that these fluke wins cannot continue. At least they can't lose next week.
Anna just showed me some of her pictures from the zoo trip. She took some good ones. Maybe, if you ask nicely, she'll post some on the blog for all to see.
People who read this blog: Person from Nepal
Dear Person from Nepal,
I'm not sure how you found this blog. I didn't know sherpas knew what the internet was. There must be a heck of a wireless signal on top of Everest. Did you wrap your yaks horns in foil to create a bigger antenna? Your flag isn't even a rectangle. Why are you reading a blog about my daily choice of underwear and my cats pooping habits? Shouldn't you be guiding foreign tourists to their deaths on the slopes of the world's tallest mountain? I don't hate you, my dear Nepali friend. I'm just astounded that you know what a blog is. Or do you?
Yours confusedly,
Hehoff
I usually check the mail before I go to the office in the morning. In this mornings mail, I found an envelope from some strange place called "Hungary." I thought Anna should probably be warned that someone from this "Hungary" place was stalking us. Inside the envelope, there were a number of very lovely pictures of some very lovely people. These people even looked kind of familiar. Strange. It was a good start to the morning.
Then the morning got worse.
Bobbie was waiting in the Community Room when I got back to the office. She said she had something to talk to me about, but this of course wasn't as important as checking her mail. So while she did that, I pressed the "play" button on the answering machine. I had a message from Adult Protective Services. They wanted to talk to me about Beulah. They didn't say what it was concerning. They just wanted me to call back. Bobbie came in before I had a chance to call APS.
"Beulah called me this morning. She told me that Alice stole $15 from her." Well, at least that answered my question about why APS wanted to talk to me. Honestly, those first two sentences from Bobbie were all the information I really needed to hear from her. Instead, I was treated to a 45 minute speech about everything from Alice's no good kids and grandkids to Bobbie's desire to have the mortician remove her mustache when they prepared her body for viewing. Bobbie stayed on topic (i.e. Alice and Beulah) for about five minutes. The other forty minutes were all over the map. I heard more about her days working with victims of child molestation for the police department. I heard her prediction that she wouldn't be around very long. I heard how, when she dies, the city of Columbus will probably erect a statue in her honor for the charity work she has done: "Not to be bragging or anything."
Finally Bobbie left and right on queue, Beulah came in. According to Beulah, Alice had invited her over to her apartment, but while they were both there, Alice excused herself for awhile "to do laundry." When Beulah returned to her apartment, she discovered $15 missing. She admitted to me that she can't prove it, but she knows that Alice did it. I was treated to another fifteen minutes of far more focussed ranting. I got to hear all about how Alice's son Tony and her other family members don't work and how Alice would do anything for them. She seemed the most upset that she'd now how to lock her door whenever she wasn't in her apartment. I just let her talk it out, and when she left, I think she was at least satisfied that I knew the situation and that I couldn't do much about it.
During my conversation with Beulah, Daulton tried to come in and add his two cents about Alice's grandson's thieving ways, but I made him wait. When Beulah left, I explained to Daulton that I didn't want Beulah or anyone else knowing more than they already did about the situation. It would just make them more upset and angry and, it wouldn't lead to a resolution. I did, however, let Daulton tell me what he knew. According to Daulton, Alice's grandson proudly told him about robbing someone who owed him money. He told Daulton all about stealing an ipod and a gps and a cell phone as revenge. It doesn't surprise me. What frustrates me is the little I can do about it.
After I finally got all done talking to Bobbie and Beulah and Daulton, I managed to call the guy from APS back. He didn't answer. I left a message and provided him with my office hours. I never did get a call back. We'll see if he calls me tomorrow.
Nothing else too interesting happened while I was in the office today, but that doesn't mean my day stopped being interesting.
At about 4:30, I had taken Daisy outside, so she could relieve herself. While we were out there, I sound caught my attention. I realized I had been hearing it for at least a minute or two before it finally registered, and when it did register, I thought, "Uh oh." It was the unmistakeable sound of a smoke alarm. I headed a little closer to the building to see if I could tell where it was coming from and saw the buildings fire alarm lights flashing. It wasn't just someones smoke detector. It was the entire apartments alarm system that was going off. I hurried inside with Daisy and grabbed my keys. In the hallways, I found most of the residents looking around bewilderedly. Some were banging on other resident's doors to make sure they were alright. I saw no immediate sign of a fire, and the noise of the alarm made it impossible to think, so I first went to the office and reset the system. Once it was reset, I started exploring the building and asking residents if they had checked on the people that weren't in the hall. Several people started telling me they could smell smoke in the short wing of the building. I was about to head over there to investigate when the alarm started sounding again. I reset it again, and then headed towards what turned out to be a very smokey hallway. I could see all the residents from that wing except Katie, so I asked if anyone had checked on her. No one had and I was about to go myself when the alarm started sounding again. I reset it and then made my way to Katie's apartment. I learned from those ahead of me that Katie was indeed the source of all the smoke. Apparently, Katie and George had been sitting around smoking, and Katie had brilliantly decided that she should dispose of her cigarette in a wastebasket. Needless to say, this lead to a small, very smokey, fire. I checked on George and Katie myself to make sure that the fire was indeed out. The wastebasket ended up safely on her front porch. I then made sure Katie had her back door opened, to vent the smoke, and I had the hallway doors propped to air out the building. It still required two more trips to the office to reset the system, before all was quiet.
I wasn't back in my apartment long when I had a knock on the door. Mildred wanted to know how to open the screen on her storm doors. I wasn't too surprised at this request, since the screen rolls up very cleverly at the top of the door, but when I looked at her door, I was, for a minute, stumped myself. I finally gathered that her door, though it looked the same as the rest, had a different latch system for the screen. I showed her how it worked and returned to my apartment.
Fortunately, so far I haven't had to have any more dealings with residents since Mildred came calling.
I'm about to go to Wal-Mart.
My right nostrel itches.
Red (I think). I'm actually wearing other clothes, so it's hard for me to tell.
The Broncos are terrible. They will have no chance against real opponents. So far they have had one of the easiest schedules in the league. They are probably the worst 6-0 team ever. It saddens me to know that these fluke wins cannot continue. At least they can't lose next week.
Anna just showed me some of her pictures from the zoo trip. She took some good ones. Maybe, if you ask nicely, she'll post some on the blog for all to see.
People who read this blog: Person from Nepal
Dear Person from Nepal,
I'm not sure how you found this blog. I didn't know sherpas knew what the internet was. There must be a heck of a wireless signal on top of Everest. Did you wrap your yaks horns in foil to create a bigger antenna? Your flag isn't even a rectangle. Why are you reading a blog about my daily choice of underwear and my cats pooping habits? Shouldn't you be guiding foreign tourists to their deaths on the slopes of the world's tallest mountain? I don't hate you, my dear Nepali friend. I'm just astounded that you know what a blog is. Or do you?
Yours confusedly,
Hehoff
Saturday, October 17, 2009
The King of Indiana
Call me, "Your Majesty." More on that later.
For now, I'll talk about other stuff.
This is stuff I should have talked about before, but I was lazy and/or busy and/or tired.
Thursday and Friday seemed like vacations because Daulton wasn't here.
I think I may have just cut my butt with my fingernail. That being said, I really need to trim my fingernails.
I've forgotten any other interesting happenings from Thursday and Friday in the office.
Let us progress to Friday, post-office (as opposed to a post office).
Project 86 played The Gear in Franklin last night. I went of course.
The opening act was, the newly re-founded, Kids in the Way. They sounded alright. I'd never seen them before. They weren't my favorite, but I'd definitely heard worse opening acts.
Children 18:3 played next. I found them highly annoying. Now, I should preface this with a little honesty. Children 18:3 has an incredibly stupid name. They also have a guitarist/vocalist who smears eye-shadow all around his eyes to look like a raccoon. These two facts I knew beforehand and came into the evening expecting to dislike them. So I disliked them from the start. They gave me this positive: they are very energetic and enthusiastic. They gave me this negative: their songs are stupid. They gave me this positive: the drummer had a pretty good solo. They gave me this negative: the guitarist is horrible at stage banter. They gave me this positive: the bassist did nothing in particular to really annoy me. They gave me this negative: the guitarist does this weird mutation of the "devil's horns," where he flashes the horns and then bends his pointer and pinkie finger to meet in the middle, which he seems to find way too fascinating, because he wouldn't stop doing it all night long (even when they weren't on stage). Essentially, that left me where I started. They did just enough to keep me from either raising or lowering my opinion of them. Mostly I just wanted to punch their guitarist.
The Wedding was just okay. Apparently, they have a decent number of fans. Several people were really into their set. I thought they were pretty average.
Showbread is insane. I don't know if that is good or bad. They wear matching outfits (Except the vocalist paired his shirt with a set of black leggings that looked a mix between leather and spandex, over the top of which he placed what appeared to be girls corduroy short-shorts. He accompanied this ensemble with a black rubber glove on one hand and bright blue eye-shadow.). Their band includes a keytar. The vocalist enjoys calling people "dummies." They concluded their set by dancing a fully prepared rendition of the "Can-Can," complete with full choreography. Like I said, they are insane.
Project 86 took their rightful place as headliners. They performed a very different set than I had seen at the other four shows I attended this year. They kicked the show off with one of my all time favorites: "P.S." The song is so weighty and lurching. It's pulsing and slogging and heavy and deep and completely different from their typical opening song. I loved it. They played a few of their standard songs, such as "Safe Haven," "Sincerely, Ichabod," and "The Spy Hunter," but they also brought out some songs they hadn't played in awhile, if ever. "Oblivion" and "Open-hand" made appearances for the first time ever. "Hollow Again" and "Say Goodnight to the Bad Guy" reappeared after long hiatuses (Yes, "hiatuses" is the plural of "hiatus." I checked). "Evil (A Chorus of Resistance)" and "Illuminate" made their way onto the set-list again. They played "Destroyer" and "The Butcher" from their latest release. I had seen "The Butcher" at their show in Evansville, but this is the first time they are playing "Destroyer." It makes an awesome song live. The evening was concluded with the crowd pleaser, "Stein's Theme." For the last two songs, "Evil" and "Stein's Theme," the crown had the floor bouncing enough to make me question the structural integrity of the building. Needless to say, it was an excellent show. It was certainly one of the best set-lists I have heard them play. Afterwards, when I talked to Andrew, I forgot to mention the one song I would have added: "Another Boredom Movement." But on the whole, all I could really ask for was a longer set, not a different one.
Oh, and if you are wondering why I am the king of Indiana. When I approached Andrew after the show, it was the first thing he said to me. "You're the king of Indiana. What is this, five shows this year? Hey (to the merch guy), this guy is the king of Indiana. Hey (to the bassist of Children 18:3), this guy is the king of Indiana. He's come to five of our shows this year." After this odd exchange, we chatted for a bit about past shows. I explained my movement from Colorado to Michigan to Indiana. When he heard Michigan, he commented that they had played at Calvin and fondly remembered Ken Heffner. Maybe artists do like performing at Calvin?
Before I left, Andrew said that they'd be touring again in February/March and would probably be back this way. I sure hope so. There's nothing like having your voice feel completely shredded for a few days after a show.
So that brings us to today. Today, we went to the zoo. Anna and I took the three children of my in-laws' neighbors to the zoo. We were going to go to Cincinnati, but the forecast predicted rain, so we went to Indianapolis instead.
Anna and I agreed to pick Elizabeth, Abby, and Noah up at 9 a.m. Before we did that, we took Daisy to the in-laws so they could watch her while we were gone. When we did pull up to the kid's house, we were greeted by Noah coming out to us carrying a giant blue inflatable monkey. He held this all the way to the zoo.
At the zoo, we made sure we saw everything there was to see. I don't really want to go animal by animals, so I'll go with the highlights. Everyone loved the sea lions and seals, which was the first thing we saw. After that we saw the lonely tiger, who wouldn't turn and face us for a picture. One of my favorite exhibits was the two Alaskan brown bears, who had come to the zoo because their mother had been killed for mauling a jogger. We, together, lamented the fate of the bald eagle because he had to be cooped up with a bunch of ravens and buzzards. We checked out the "Encounters" exhibits, which had common farm type animals so that the kids could see things they had never encountered before (coughcoughsarcasmcoughcough, coughcoughfarmkidscoughcough, coughcoughhickscoughcough). We got a chuckle out of that.
There was a merry-go-round near the exhibit, and Noah really wanted to ride. Because it is the Halloween season, they ran the thing backwards and played creepy music. It was cool.
One of the main attractions of the Indianapolis zoo is their dolphin show. They send five dolphins flying through the air and jumping to great heights, all the while splashing water over eager children. It's a good time.
After the dolphins, we checked out the "Desert" exhibit. The kids enjoyed the lizards and turtles and such. Abby especially loved the meercats. The snake gallery was also in this larger building. In there, I got to be impressed by the abilities of Anna's camera to take good pictures (without flash) in extremely minimal lighting.
In the "Plains" section, we were disappointed to have missed the feeding times for the giraffes. We were also disappointed to see that one of the exhibits was shut down due to the construction of a new cheetah display. Cheetahs do sound pretty pimping though.
One of the biggest highlights of the day was watching one of the rhinos relieve himself for what seemed like an eternity. The kids were all impressed with his resemblance to a hose. And the pee just kept coming and coming, and every time it seemed it would stop, it came out in a new pressure washing rush (I'm pretty positive this is the first thing the kids told their mother, when they got home). The lions were pretty sweet. We also saw a wild dog, which seemed awfully lonely as it ran the circumference of its display, over and over again. The final "Plains" exhibit was the elephants. Here was another highlight as we watched one of the elephants evacuate what appeared to be five-gallon bucket-fulls of waste. We were awed by the sound poop could make, falling in such a quantity and from such a height.
The last portion we saw was the "Oceans." There was a lonely polar bear and three walruses. Two of the walruses had body-parts that the kids mistook for bellybuttons. We let them remain under that impression. The "Oceans" also included a shark pet tank. Noah was afraid the sharks would bite him, so it took us quite awhile to get him to successfully pet a shark. Though honestly, I would say it was more of a "poke" than a "pet." The last thing we saw before leaving were the penguins. Again, we marveled at the high velocity pooping some wild animals can produce.
In the gift shop, Noah spent all $30 of his birthday money on a stuffed penguin that was roughly as big as he is. Anna got herself a giraffe puppet. We gave her a good name, but I can't remember it. Abby and Elizabeth each got small things.
On the way back, Noah feel asleep in his car-seat. While he was asleep, Abby removed his penguin from his arms. When Noah woke up twenty minutes later, his first, panicked, question was "Where's my penguin?"
We returned the kids safe and sound and then went over to the in-laws' for a bit before heading back. Daisy was glad to see Anna.
Then we came back here.
Gray.
I was sitting at my computer, decompressing, when I received an email from my father. I opened it and just started laughing. For the third time in three hunts, he has bagged the biggest deer of his life in the first two hours of hunting on a certain piece of public hunting land in eastern Colorado. I called him up and talked to him for awhile about it. I told him he needs to learn patience, but as long as he keeps seeing deer this big, he's going to have a hard time passing them up. This particular buck looks like one off of those controlled environment hunts, where the guys are hunting on leased property over special food-plots. I just told my dad that when I shoot something bigger this year, I'll photoshop it so it looks smaller and doesn't make him feel so bad.
Something tells me this is a really long post.
I'm tired.
People who read this blog: Person searching for KY lubricant.
I once mentioned KY in this blog. Someone blogsearched KY lubricant and found our blog. They are probably a sex fiend. They are most certainly going to hell for even thinking about such evil things. Mostly, they were probably just disappointed that I wasn't giving a review of KY product performance or something. Freaks. I continue to hold to my vow of celibacy in order to fight against sickos like you. By the way, is there any word that has been more ruined by our modern culture than "lubricant?" It was a perfectly good word. Now it brings smirks. Shame on you, KY lubricant searcher, for your filthy thoughts and deeds. Thou shalt be smited with an ever increasing life of friction.
For now, I'll talk about other stuff.
This is stuff I should have talked about before, but I was lazy and/or busy and/or tired.
Thursday and Friday seemed like vacations because Daulton wasn't here.
I think I may have just cut my butt with my fingernail. That being said, I really need to trim my fingernails.
I've forgotten any other interesting happenings from Thursday and Friday in the office.
Let us progress to Friday, post-office (as opposed to a post office).
Project 86 played The Gear in Franklin last night. I went of course.
The opening act was, the newly re-founded, Kids in the Way. They sounded alright. I'd never seen them before. They weren't my favorite, but I'd definitely heard worse opening acts.
Children 18:3 played next. I found them highly annoying. Now, I should preface this with a little honesty. Children 18:3 has an incredibly stupid name. They also have a guitarist/vocalist who smears eye-shadow all around his eyes to look like a raccoon. These two facts I knew beforehand and came into the evening expecting to dislike them. So I disliked them from the start. They gave me this positive: they are very energetic and enthusiastic. They gave me this negative: their songs are stupid. They gave me this positive: the drummer had a pretty good solo. They gave me this negative: the guitarist is horrible at stage banter. They gave me this positive: the bassist did nothing in particular to really annoy me. They gave me this negative: the guitarist does this weird mutation of the "devil's horns," where he flashes the horns and then bends his pointer and pinkie finger to meet in the middle, which he seems to find way too fascinating, because he wouldn't stop doing it all night long (even when they weren't on stage). Essentially, that left me where I started. They did just enough to keep me from either raising or lowering my opinion of them. Mostly I just wanted to punch their guitarist.
The Wedding was just okay. Apparently, they have a decent number of fans. Several people were really into their set. I thought they were pretty average.
Showbread is insane. I don't know if that is good or bad. They wear matching outfits (Except the vocalist paired his shirt with a set of black leggings that looked a mix between leather and spandex, over the top of which he placed what appeared to be girls corduroy short-shorts. He accompanied this ensemble with a black rubber glove on one hand and bright blue eye-shadow.). Their band includes a keytar. The vocalist enjoys calling people "dummies." They concluded their set by dancing a fully prepared rendition of the "Can-Can," complete with full choreography. Like I said, they are insane.
Project 86 took their rightful place as headliners. They performed a very different set than I had seen at the other four shows I attended this year. They kicked the show off with one of my all time favorites: "P.S." The song is so weighty and lurching. It's pulsing and slogging and heavy and deep and completely different from their typical opening song. I loved it. They played a few of their standard songs, such as "Safe Haven," "Sincerely, Ichabod," and "The Spy Hunter," but they also brought out some songs they hadn't played in awhile, if ever. "Oblivion" and "Open-hand" made appearances for the first time ever. "Hollow Again" and "Say Goodnight to the Bad Guy" reappeared after long hiatuses (Yes, "hiatuses" is the plural of "hiatus." I checked). "Evil (A Chorus of Resistance)" and "Illuminate" made their way onto the set-list again. They played "Destroyer" and "The Butcher" from their latest release. I had seen "The Butcher" at their show in Evansville, but this is the first time they are playing "Destroyer." It makes an awesome song live. The evening was concluded with the crowd pleaser, "Stein's Theme." For the last two songs, "Evil" and "Stein's Theme," the crown had the floor bouncing enough to make me question the structural integrity of the building. Needless to say, it was an excellent show. It was certainly one of the best set-lists I have heard them play. Afterwards, when I talked to Andrew, I forgot to mention the one song I would have added: "Another Boredom Movement." But on the whole, all I could really ask for was a longer set, not a different one.
Oh, and if you are wondering why I am the king of Indiana. When I approached Andrew after the show, it was the first thing he said to me. "You're the king of Indiana. What is this, five shows this year? Hey (to the merch guy), this guy is the king of Indiana. Hey (to the bassist of Children 18:3), this guy is the king of Indiana. He's come to five of our shows this year." After this odd exchange, we chatted for a bit about past shows. I explained my movement from Colorado to Michigan to Indiana. When he heard Michigan, he commented that they had played at Calvin and fondly remembered Ken Heffner. Maybe artists do like performing at Calvin?
Before I left, Andrew said that they'd be touring again in February/March and would probably be back this way. I sure hope so. There's nothing like having your voice feel completely shredded for a few days after a show.
So that brings us to today. Today, we went to the zoo. Anna and I took the three children of my in-laws' neighbors to the zoo. We were going to go to Cincinnati, but the forecast predicted rain, so we went to Indianapolis instead.
Anna and I agreed to pick Elizabeth, Abby, and Noah up at 9 a.m. Before we did that, we took Daisy to the in-laws so they could watch her while we were gone. When we did pull up to the kid's house, we were greeted by Noah coming out to us carrying a giant blue inflatable monkey. He held this all the way to the zoo.
At the zoo, we made sure we saw everything there was to see. I don't really want to go animal by animals, so I'll go with the highlights. Everyone loved the sea lions and seals, which was the first thing we saw. After that we saw the lonely tiger, who wouldn't turn and face us for a picture. One of my favorite exhibits was the two Alaskan brown bears, who had come to the zoo because their mother had been killed for mauling a jogger. We, together, lamented the fate of the bald eagle because he had to be cooped up with a bunch of ravens and buzzards. We checked out the "Encounters" exhibits, which had common farm type animals so that the kids could see things they had never encountered before (coughcoughsarcasmcoughcough, coughcoughfarmkidscoughcough, coughcoughhickscoughcough). We got a chuckle out of that.
There was a merry-go-round near the exhibit, and Noah really wanted to ride. Because it is the Halloween season, they ran the thing backwards and played creepy music. It was cool.
One of the main attractions of the Indianapolis zoo is their dolphin show. They send five dolphins flying through the air and jumping to great heights, all the while splashing water over eager children. It's a good time.
After the dolphins, we checked out the "Desert" exhibit. The kids enjoyed the lizards and turtles and such. Abby especially loved the meercats. The snake gallery was also in this larger building. In there, I got to be impressed by the abilities of Anna's camera to take good pictures (without flash) in extremely minimal lighting.
In the "Plains" section, we were disappointed to have missed the feeding times for the giraffes. We were also disappointed to see that one of the exhibits was shut down due to the construction of a new cheetah display. Cheetahs do sound pretty pimping though.
One of the biggest highlights of the day was watching one of the rhinos relieve himself for what seemed like an eternity. The kids were all impressed with his resemblance to a hose. And the pee just kept coming and coming, and every time it seemed it would stop, it came out in a new pressure washing rush (I'm pretty positive this is the first thing the kids told their mother, when they got home). The lions were pretty sweet. We also saw a wild dog, which seemed awfully lonely as it ran the circumference of its display, over and over again. The final "Plains" exhibit was the elephants. Here was another highlight as we watched one of the elephants evacuate what appeared to be five-gallon bucket-fulls of waste. We were awed by the sound poop could make, falling in such a quantity and from such a height.
The last portion we saw was the "Oceans." There was a lonely polar bear and three walruses. Two of the walruses had body-parts that the kids mistook for bellybuttons. We let them remain under that impression. The "Oceans" also included a shark pet tank. Noah was afraid the sharks would bite him, so it took us quite awhile to get him to successfully pet a shark. Though honestly, I would say it was more of a "poke" than a "pet." The last thing we saw before leaving were the penguins. Again, we marveled at the high velocity pooping some wild animals can produce.
In the gift shop, Noah spent all $30 of his birthday money on a stuffed penguin that was roughly as big as he is. Anna got herself a giraffe puppet. We gave her a good name, but I can't remember it. Abby and Elizabeth each got small things.
On the way back, Noah feel asleep in his car-seat. While he was asleep, Abby removed his penguin from his arms. When Noah woke up twenty minutes later, his first, panicked, question was "Where's my penguin?"
We returned the kids safe and sound and then went over to the in-laws' for a bit before heading back. Daisy was glad to see Anna.
Then we came back here.
Gray.
I was sitting at my computer, decompressing, when I received an email from my father. I opened it and just started laughing. For the third time in three hunts, he has bagged the biggest deer of his life in the first two hours of hunting on a certain piece of public hunting land in eastern Colorado. I called him up and talked to him for awhile about it. I told him he needs to learn patience, but as long as he keeps seeing deer this big, he's going to have a hard time passing them up. This particular buck looks like one off of those controlled environment hunts, where the guys are hunting on leased property over special food-plots. I just told my dad that when I shoot something bigger this year, I'll photoshop it so it looks smaller and doesn't make him feel so bad.
Something tells me this is a really long post.
I'm tired.
People who read this blog: Person searching for KY lubricant.
I once mentioned KY in this blog. Someone blogsearched KY lubricant and found our blog. They are probably a sex fiend. They are most certainly going to hell for even thinking about such evil things. Mostly, they were probably just disappointed that I wasn't giving a review of KY product performance or something. Freaks. I continue to hold to my vow of celibacy in order to fight against sickos like you. By the way, is there any word that has been more ruined by our modern culture than "lubricant?" It was a perfectly good word. Now it brings smirks. Shame on you, KY lubricant searcher, for your filthy thoughts and deeds. Thou shalt be smited with an ever increasing life of friction.
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
Shopping
Once again, the first thing in my day worth discussing is Daulton. Well, I suppose "worth discussing" depends on your point of view. None of this is really worth discussing, but I'm pretty sure that's my whole point. If that's not my whole point, then I have no idea what I'm doing.
Daulton gets a Fall break. It starts tomorrow. I won't have to deal with him again until Monday.
Daulton had a court appearance last night. I guess they just told him that this is his last appearance as long as he stays out of trouble. I hope he does. His existence depresses me.
My unmentionables itch.
My right earlobe itches.
If I stop to think about it, everything starts to itch. See for yourself. Just sit for a minute and think about whether or not you itch anywhere.
You're welcome.
Taz in boxers boxers.
I'm not sure what conclusions people might draw about me from reading this blog. Most probably just think that I'm an idiot. Those who know me know that I'm an idiot. Those who haven't seen me in a long time probably wonder what happened to the person they knew back in the day. Am I still that person? I have no idea.
Today is the second Wednesday of the month. This means that Mike payed his rent, and the exterminator came and sprayed the apartments. When the exterminator showed up, Daulton felt it necessary to show him his new PSP. Daulton bewilders the poor guy.
My feet are chilly. I just took Daisy outside. It's been drizzling all day and now my feel are wet and cold. Daisy decided she didn't have to pee.
We did a tiny bit of clothes shopping tonight. Anna got a purple coat. I got a couple shirts. At Target, Anna ran into a girl with whom she used to work. It's funny because before we went into Target Anna said, "I hope I don't see anyone I know here." Around here, that can be hard to avoid.
People who read this blog: Random Japanese Person
I'm out of people that I know personally who read this blog. The hit tracker I use does, however, tell me that many people I don't know have read this blog. One such person seems to be from Japan. I suspect this person is male because I feel like it. I'll bet he's not even Japanese. He's probably a missionary kid. He's also probably a furry. I'm pretty sure everyone in Japan is a furry. He probably came upon our blog due to my comments about Sara being a furry. His parents probably have no idea about his strange proclivities. He surely left this blog disappointed that I'm not actually a furry or a proponent of furry-kind.
Daulton gets a Fall break. It starts tomorrow. I won't have to deal with him again until Monday.
Daulton had a court appearance last night. I guess they just told him that this is his last appearance as long as he stays out of trouble. I hope he does. His existence depresses me.
My unmentionables itch.
My right earlobe itches.
If I stop to think about it, everything starts to itch. See for yourself. Just sit for a minute and think about whether or not you itch anywhere.
You're welcome.
Taz in boxers boxers.
I'm not sure what conclusions people might draw about me from reading this blog. Most probably just think that I'm an idiot. Those who know me know that I'm an idiot. Those who haven't seen me in a long time probably wonder what happened to the person they knew back in the day. Am I still that person? I have no idea.
Today is the second Wednesday of the month. This means that Mike payed his rent, and the exterminator came and sprayed the apartments. When the exterminator showed up, Daulton felt it necessary to show him his new PSP. Daulton bewilders the poor guy.
My feet are chilly. I just took Daisy outside. It's been drizzling all day and now my feel are wet and cold. Daisy decided she didn't have to pee.
We did a tiny bit of clothes shopping tonight. Anna got a purple coat. I got a couple shirts. At Target, Anna ran into a girl with whom she used to work. It's funny because before we went into Target Anna said, "I hope I don't see anyone I know here." Around here, that can be hard to avoid.
People who read this blog: Random Japanese Person
I'm out of people that I know personally who read this blog. The hit tracker I use does, however, tell me that many people I don't know have read this blog. One such person seems to be from Japan. I suspect this person is male because I feel like it. I'll bet he's not even Japanese. He's probably a missionary kid. He's also probably a furry. I'm pretty sure everyone in Japan is a furry. He probably came upon our blog due to my comments about Sara being a furry. His parents probably have no idea about his strange proclivities. He surely left this blog disappointed that I'm not actually a furry or a proponent of furry-kind.
Another Day Another [insert something interesting here]
Daulton left early for a court date. He didn't know why exactly he had to go to court today. I guess I'll find out tomorrow.
Anna hurt her shoulder. I suspect she did it climbing onto a horse yesterday. She's in a lot of pain. You should probably feel sorry for her.
I cleaned out the guinea pig cage and the litter box.
Daisy pooped a couple times.
Red.
My left ear itches.
Now my right ear itches.
Now my right elbow itches.
We went to the Fall band concert for Anna's alma mater. When did not do this because it is Anna's alma mater. We did it because the girl who Anna gave lessons to is in the band. Because of football season, the concert band spends all its time on marching band. Thus, this concert was simply a sit down performance of all their marching pieces. It seems like a huge waste of time to me, but I guess marching band is a big money getter.
After the concert, we went to the in-laws for a bit to search for various and sundry items we might have left there. I found a few belts. Anna found some hoodies. Unfortunately, we couldn't find one of the things we were after and forgot the other. I won't tell you what those things are either. You can just let that little mystery tickle your neurons for a bit.
I'll most likely shower tonight.
I want to go give my wife a huge hug, but I think she would end up crying because it would hurt her shoulder so much.
Daulton got a PSP with his birthday money. He has one game: "Grand Theft Auto." Somehow, this seems like the last game this kid should be allowed to play.
Alice's grandson doesn't ever go to school. Daulton once asked Alice why her grandson wasn't in school. She said it was because he didn't feel like it that day. Apparently, he never feels like it. People in Alice's family sure aspire to lofty heights.
My right ear canal itches. I'm wearing headphones and don't want to move them to scratch. My life is a never ending cycle of torment.
People who read this blog: Sarah
Sarah is not Anna's sister. Sarah is Anna's redheaded music major friend. Sarah just got married. Sarah is very friendly. I don't know Sarah very well, but I do know that she is an extremely gifted musician, specializing in the clarinet. As I said, I really don't know Sarah very well. I believe she stumbled upon our blog via a friends blog. I think she now probably knows me too well. I'd make up lies about her for your amusement, except I don't even know her well enough to make up lies. Unless my lies were that she was really mean and an awful musician. There you have it. Sarah is a jerk and can't play the clarinet worth a popcorn fart.
Anna hurt her shoulder. I suspect she did it climbing onto a horse yesterday. She's in a lot of pain. You should probably feel sorry for her.
I cleaned out the guinea pig cage and the litter box.
Daisy pooped a couple times.
Red.
My left ear itches.
Now my right ear itches.
Now my right elbow itches.
We went to the Fall band concert for Anna's alma mater. When did not do this because it is Anna's alma mater. We did it because the girl who Anna gave lessons to is in the band. Because of football season, the concert band spends all its time on marching band. Thus, this concert was simply a sit down performance of all their marching pieces. It seems like a huge waste of time to me, but I guess marching band is a big money getter.
After the concert, we went to the in-laws for a bit to search for various and sundry items we might have left there. I found a few belts. Anna found some hoodies. Unfortunately, we couldn't find one of the things we were after and forgot the other. I won't tell you what those things are either. You can just let that little mystery tickle your neurons for a bit.
I'll most likely shower tonight.
I want to go give my wife a huge hug, but I think she would end up crying because it would hurt her shoulder so much.
Daulton got a PSP with his birthday money. He has one game: "Grand Theft Auto." Somehow, this seems like the last game this kid should be allowed to play.
Alice's grandson doesn't ever go to school. Daulton once asked Alice why her grandson wasn't in school. She said it was because he didn't feel like it that day. Apparently, he never feels like it. People in Alice's family sure aspire to lofty heights.
My right ear canal itches. I'm wearing headphones and don't want to move them to scratch. My life is a never ending cycle of torment.
People who read this blog: Sarah
Sarah is not Anna's sister. Sarah is Anna's redheaded music major friend. Sarah just got married. Sarah is very friendly. I don't know Sarah very well, but I do know that she is an extremely gifted musician, specializing in the clarinet. As I said, I really don't know Sarah very well. I believe she stumbled upon our blog via a friends blog. I think she now probably knows me too well. I'd make up lies about her for your amusement, except I don't even know her well enough to make up lies. Unless my lies were that she was really mean and an awful musician. There you have it. Sarah is a jerk and can't play the clarinet worth a popcorn fart.
Monday, October 12, 2009
Zombies
!@#%
!@#%
!@#%
Life no longer has meaning.
Daulton is terrified of zombies. Anna doesn't believe me, but I think he's serious. Several times, he has asked what we would do in the event of a zombie takeover.
George's nurse stopped in the office for a minute. She said she needed a break from breathing the air in George's apartment. She is trying to quit smoking and can no longer stand being around cigarette smoke.
My head hurts.
Camouflage Taz.
"How will we open the eyes of the dead,/When we are hollow?"
Kansas doesn't appear to be working out for Anna's parents. She has apparently been very uncooperative as well as rather jumpy. Instead, they are looking into getting a horse that has spent his life as a therapy animal.
Project 86 plays in Franklin this Friday.
Tomorrow, one of the flower girls from our wedding has a band concert. I think we're going to go. She's the same girl that Anna was giving trumpet lessons to this summer.
Today, Daisy tried to set a record for pooping.
The top of my left foot itches. Will someone scratch it for me?
I ate an entire batch of Pillsbury Orange Sweet Rolls for lunch.
Bobbie wanted $10 more in quarters today.
Bobbie also gave Daulton a bunch of popcorn (23 packs of a 24 pack box, to be precise).
Happy Columbus day.
Anna's evil grandmother went to the evening service at Brown's Corner last night, accompanied by the Majors from the Salvation Army. I didn't go because I had caught my death of a Broncos' game. Evil grandma decided that since she was gracing them with her presence, Anna and her father should of course specially prepare extra music for her own personal entertainment. Yeah, I'm proud to say that neither Anna or her father acquiesced to this request. Anna tells me that this made dear evil grandmother very angry. Huzzah.
Anna really wants to take some of the kids from that church to the zoo this Saturday. She says it's mostly just an excuse for her to go herself.
I feel really old. The reason I feel old is that I'm to the point where I no longer feel particularly shocked when I find out someone my age is having a baby. For the longest time, my first thought upon hearing baby news was "Uh oh, someone is in trouble." I guess I'm thinking about it because Saturday, at the coffeehouse churchy thing, Anna and I talked to two of Anna's friends, Chelsey and Erin, who are my age and are going to be/already are mothers. Maybe it's because I don't know them too well and have only heard about them from a distance? I know for a fact I would still be weirded out should any of my Calvin friends announce they have a bun in the oven.
My left butt cheek itches.
Chief can be an affectionate little bugger.
I might try to go to bed early and forget the events of the day.
People who read this blog (or maybe read it once and then promptly forgot it existed): Bob
Bob is a womanizer. He's also a White Sox fan. Obama is a Sox fan. I will always hold this against Bob. We call him Bobo. He lived across the hall from the infamous D10. Anna and I drove down to Florida for Sara's wedding, with Bob. We're talking about driving down there again this winter. Bob is essentially Quagmire from Family Guy (he denies it). Bob will probably never read this because he is too busy maintaining people's lawns and wooing women. We crashed at Bobo's parent's house the night before Jana and her incidental husband's wedding. Bob's family has cats. One cat is enormous and hates the world. Bob loves Howie. Bob has never met Chief. Bob was an usher at our wedding. He made funny faces while escorting male relatives down the aisle. Bob has a brother who looks and sounds exactly like him. When I see pictures of them on facebook, sometimes I don't know who I am seeing. Bob is nominally a Bears fan, preferring baseball to football, but he is very grateful for McDaniels' mishandling of Jay Cutler. Bob and Mike liked to say inappropriate things around the girls of D10. This got Bob and Mike yelled at a lot.
!@#%
!@#%
Life no longer has meaning.
Daulton is terrified of zombies. Anna doesn't believe me, but I think he's serious. Several times, he has asked what we would do in the event of a zombie takeover.
George's nurse stopped in the office for a minute. She said she needed a break from breathing the air in George's apartment. She is trying to quit smoking and can no longer stand being around cigarette smoke.
My head hurts.
Camouflage Taz.
"How will we open the eyes of the dead,/When we are hollow?"
Kansas doesn't appear to be working out for Anna's parents. She has apparently been very uncooperative as well as rather jumpy. Instead, they are looking into getting a horse that has spent his life as a therapy animal.
Project 86 plays in Franklin this Friday.
Tomorrow, one of the flower girls from our wedding has a band concert. I think we're going to go. She's the same girl that Anna was giving trumpet lessons to this summer.
Today, Daisy tried to set a record for pooping.
The top of my left foot itches. Will someone scratch it for me?
I ate an entire batch of Pillsbury Orange Sweet Rolls for lunch.
Bobbie wanted $10 more in quarters today.
Bobbie also gave Daulton a bunch of popcorn (23 packs of a 24 pack box, to be precise).
Happy Columbus day.
Anna's evil grandmother went to the evening service at Brown's Corner last night, accompanied by the Majors from the Salvation Army. I didn't go because I had caught my death of a Broncos' game. Evil grandma decided that since she was gracing them with her presence, Anna and her father should of course specially prepare extra music for her own personal entertainment. Yeah, I'm proud to say that neither Anna or her father acquiesced to this request. Anna tells me that this made dear evil grandmother very angry. Huzzah.
Anna really wants to take some of the kids from that church to the zoo this Saturday. She says it's mostly just an excuse for her to go herself.
I feel really old. The reason I feel old is that I'm to the point where I no longer feel particularly shocked when I find out someone my age is having a baby. For the longest time, my first thought upon hearing baby news was "Uh oh, someone is in trouble." I guess I'm thinking about it because Saturday, at the coffeehouse churchy thing, Anna and I talked to two of Anna's friends, Chelsey and Erin, who are my age and are going to be/already are mothers. Maybe it's because I don't know them too well and have only heard about them from a distance? I know for a fact I would still be weirded out should any of my Calvin friends announce they have a bun in the oven.
My left butt cheek itches.
Chief can be an affectionate little bugger.
I might try to go to bed early and forget the events of the day.
People who read this blog (or maybe read it once and then promptly forgot it existed): Bob
Bob is a womanizer. He's also a White Sox fan. Obama is a Sox fan. I will always hold this against Bob. We call him Bobo. He lived across the hall from the infamous D10. Anna and I drove down to Florida for Sara's wedding, with Bob. We're talking about driving down there again this winter. Bob is essentially Quagmire from Family Guy (he denies it). Bob will probably never read this because he is too busy maintaining people's lawns and wooing women. We crashed at Bobo's parent's house the night before Jana and her incidental husband's wedding. Bob's family has cats. One cat is enormous and hates the world. Bob loves Howie. Bob has never met Chief. Bob was an usher at our wedding. He made funny faces while escorting male relatives down the aisle. Bob has a brother who looks and sounds exactly like him. When I see pictures of them on facebook, sometimes I don't know who I am seeing. Bob is nominally a Bears fan, preferring baseball to football, but he is very grateful for McDaniels' mishandling of Jay Cutler. Bob and Mike liked to say inappropriate things around the girls of D10. This got Bob and Mike yelled at a lot.
Saturday, October 10, 2009
It Just Keeps Raining
My stomach is twisting me up a little bit.
Daulton told me that his teacher/detention center person was going to come by today to check on him. The guy never showed up.
There is a flood warning through the weekend. Anna's parents were going to go horseback riding. The sky just went and pooped on that idea.
We decided to take Daisy with us to see the in-laws this evening. We'd been there for about five minutes, when I received a call from Mike, informing me that he was locked out. I told him I was on my way, but it would take me at least twenty minutes. Anna's dad decided he wanted to come with me. He ended up driving. I'm not sure what made him want to come. It kind of felt like he wanted to get me alone so he could give me a good talking to or something. Except he didn't.
We got there. I let Mike into his place. We left. And on the way back, Anna's father stopped and picked up a gallon of ice cream. So we ate ice cream when we got back to their house.
Anna's mom is funny. When we got back, she was in the basement watching TV, but she needed to tell her husband something. So she called him on the phone.
While they talked on the phone, I found Anna in the bathroom giving Daisy a bath. Hank rolled her into the pond, and she had gotten all muddy. I guess she is clean now.
My back is a little tight.
I could live off of orange sweet roll things.
Tomorrow, Anna is singing with Chelsey for that church coffeehouse thing. I told Anna that the Rockies' game isn't until 9:30, so I'll come. Were they to conflict, I'd say, "You're driving yourself, woman!" I wouldn't. I'm lying.
They can't give the Nobel prize for literature to an American, but they can give the peace prize to a president for two weeks of service?
I should take a shower tonight. Heck, I might even change things up and shave. Or I might not.
Sky blue, white and black horizontally striped, boxer-briefs. I like these when I first put them on, but they just get stretched out too fast. In the end, they just wear like boxers.
Anna took her camera tonight. I think she got some video of Hank pulling Daisy around the living room. Those two have fun together. Lucy, on the other hand, is jealous and hates it when anyone but her gets attention. She just sat and sulked all night.
Project 86 is a week away from Franklin. Oh man, it will be epic.
People who read this blog: Heather
Heather is currently doing missions work in Guatamala. She is also currently engaged to a guy who is not currently in Guatamala, currently. I know their pain. Heather is one of our dear friends from the D10 year. She spent a semester in Guatemala that opened up the space for Andi to room with Anna. Second semester, Andi was gone, and Heather was in her place. Both turned out to be awesome roommates for Anna. Had Heather been around first semester, I'm sure she would have been a bridesmaid, but as it was, Anna had her act as her attendant. That worked out well. Heather, Sara, and Jana all lived together as sophomores, and Anna got added into the club, their junior year. Those are some awesome girls. I'm jealous of Heather's fiancee's ability to grow a man beard. I only grow a girly beard. All of us are just waiting impatiently for Heather to get back from Guatemala and get married, so that we can all go to the wedding. Heather is Dutch. Sara is Dutch. Jana is Dutch. Heather is brunette. Sara is blond. Jana is redheaded. Weird. Heather majored in social work. She likes to pretend that she cares about people. Heather stayed in our apartment in Grand Rapids last summer, while we were here in Indiana. We charged her an arm and a leg too. Not really. She didn't even burn the place down or anything. Heather may or may not ever read this. She doesn't check this blog very often because she is so busy pretending to help people in Guatemala. That's sad because she's a cool girl, and I want her to know that I'd make a great bridesmaid.
Daulton told me that his teacher/detention center person was going to come by today to check on him. The guy never showed up.
There is a flood warning through the weekend. Anna's parents were going to go horseback riding. The sky just went and pooped on that idea.
We decided to take Daisy with us to see the in-laws this evening. We'd been there for about five minutes, when I received a call from Mike, informing me that he was locked out. I told him I was on my way, but it would take me at least twenty minutes. Anna's dad decided he wanted to come with me. He ended up driving. I'm not sure what made him want to come. It kind of felt like he wanted to get me alone so he could give me a good talking to or something. Except he didn't.
We got there. I let Mike into his place. We left. And on the way back, Anna's father stopped and picked up a gallon of ice cream. So we ate ice cream when we got back to their house.
Anna's mom is funny. When we got back, she was in the basement watching TV, but she needed to tell her husband something. So she called him on the phone.
While they talked on the phone, I found Anna in the bathroom giving Daisy a bath. Hank rolled her into the pond, and she had gotten all muddy. I guess she is clean now.
My back is a little tight.
I could live off of orange sweet roll things.
Tomorrow, Anna is singing with Chelsey for that church coffeehouse thing. I told Anna that the Rockies' game isn't until 9:30, so I'll come. Were they to conflict, I'd say, "You're driving yourself, woman!" I wouldn't. I'm lying.
They can't give the Nobel prize for literature to an American, but they can give the peace prize to a president for two weeks of service?
I should take a shower tonight. Heck, I might even change things up and shave. Or I might not.
Sky blue, white and black horizontally striped, boxer-briefs. I like these when I first put them on, but they just get stretched out too fast. In the end, they just wear like boxers.
Anna took her camera tonight. I think she got some video of Hank pulling Daisy around the living room. Those two have fun together. Lucy, on the other hand, is jealous and hates it when anyone but her gets attention. She just sat and sulked all night.
Project 86 is a week away from Franklin. Oh man, it will be epic.
People who read this blog: Heather
Heather is currently doing missions work in Guatamala. She is also currently engaged to a guy who is not currently in Guatamala, currently. I know their pain. Heather is one of our dear friends from the D10 year. She spent a semester in Guatemala that opened up the space for Andi to room with Anna. Second semester, Andi was gone, and Heather was in her place. Both turned out to be awesome roommates for Anna. Had Heather been around first semester, I'm sure she would have been a bridesmaid, but as it was, Anna had her act as her attendant. That worked out well. Heather, Sara, and Jana all lived together as sophomores, and Anna got added into the club, their junior year. Those are some awesome girls. I'm jealous of Heather's fiancee's ability to grow a man beard. I only grow a girly beard. All of us are just waiting impatiently for Heather to get back from Guatemala and get married, so that we can all go to the wedding. Heather is Dutch. Sara is Dutch. Jana is Dutch. Heather is brunette. Sara is blond. Jana is redheaded. Weird. Heather majored in social work. She likes to pretend that she cares about people. Heather stayed in our apartment in Grand Rapids last summer, while we were here in Indiana. We charged her an arm and a leg too. Not really. She didn't even burn the place down or anything. Heather may or may not ever read this. She doesn't check this blog very often because she is so busy pretending to help people in Guatemala. That's sad because she's a cool girl, and I want her to know that I'd make a great bridesmaid.
Thursday, October 8, 2009
I Need Something to Drink
It has rained almost all day long. There is a lake behind our patio. We're currently under a flood watch. It's supposed to rain all day tomorrow. They have already declared a flood warning for the weekend. I'm rather nervous about the possibility of flooding in the complex.
Daulton's doctors are specifically trying to determine if it's his medication that has kept him from hitting puberty.
I let Daulton start on a puzzle in the Community Room. Hopefully, residents will try their hands at it as well, as long as Bobbie doesn't decide to put it away first.
Janet's sister-in-law stopped by and just started talking to me about all sorts of meaningless stuff. She didn't want anything other than to just keep talking. I just kept nodding. She actually got a phone call in the middle of this from her daughter, that she said she had to take. She told her daughter that she was in the middle of talking with me and that she'd call her back later. She wasn't talking with me. She was talking at me.
We need 10 more wins. Let's start with a win on Saturday and go from there.
A sports writer made an interesting comment in his article today. He said that the 4-0 Broncos record was precisely the reason we should still be peeved at McDaniels. The Broncos at 4-0 right now, with Kyle Orton, makes them a "nice story." If the Broncos were at 4-0 and still had Jay Cutler, they would be a Superbowl contender. Indeed.
I should take Daisy out again.
I keep burping.
I need to pee.
Sexy "Euro style" dark turquoise.
I don't really have much else to say.
People who read this blog: Kendra
Kendra is a music ed. major, doing her fifth year thing. In case you hadn't guessed, music classes are where she and Anna became friends. Kendra is also Anna's euchre partner in the epic Kendra/Anna vs. Angela/Geoffrey euchre wars. Kendra is one of the younger friends we have, and we like to think she is the most naive. Her favorite word is "ridiculous," and she enjoys dressing up in green leggings and running around in the woods pretending she is Robin Hood or something. She is a talented floutist, who played this kick-butt song "Zoomtube" during her recital last year. It involved her yelling into her flute. I'm glad she did it with her eyes shut or else she wouldn't have been able to stop laughing at the looks on our faces. Kendra aspires to hitchhike across Europe, where I suspect she will start an international incident that will bring about the end of the world. I also suspect that this incident will somehow originate with Kendra's very loud and distinctive laugh. This laugh will come soaring from miles away only to interrupt talks between world powers. Germany will believe that France is laughing at them, while Russia will accuse the U.S. Fisticuffs will break out and lead to the war to end all wars.
Daulton's doctors are specifically trying to determine if it's his medication that has kept him from hitting puberty.
I let Daulton start on a puzzle in the Community Room. Hopefully, residents will try their hands at it as well, as long as Bobbie doesn't decide to put it away first.
Janet's sister-in-law stopped by and just started talking to me about all sorts of meaningless stuff. She didn't want anything other than to just keep talking. I just kept nodding. She actually got a phone call in the middle of this from her daughter, that she said she had to take. She told her daughter that she was in the middle of talking with me and that she'd call her back later. She wasn't talking with me. She was talking at me.
We need 10 more wins. Let's start with a win on Saturday and go from there.
A sports writer made an interesting comment in his article today. He said that the 4-0 Broncos record was precisely the reason we should still be peeved at McDaniels. The Broncos at 4-0 right now, with Kyle Orton, makes them a "nice story." If the Broncos were at 4-0 and still had Jay Cutler, they would be a Superbowl contender. Indeed.
I should take Daisy out again.
I keep burping.
I need to pee.
Sexy "Euro style" dark turquoise.
I don't really have much else to say.
People who read this blog: Kendra
Kendra is a music ed. major, doing her fifth year thing. In case you hadn't guessed, music classes are where she and Anna became friends. Kendra is also Anna's euchre partner in the epic Kendra/Anna vs. Angela/Geoffrey euchre wars. Kendra is one of the younger friends we have, and we like to think she is the most naive. Her favorite word is "ridiculous," and she enjoys dressing up in green leggings and running around in the woods pretending she is Robin Hood or something. She is a talented floutist, who played this kick-butt song "Zoomtube" during her recital last year. It involved her yelling into her flute. I'm glad she did it with her eyes shut or else she wouldn't have been able to stop laughing at the looks on our faces. Kendra aspires to hitchhike across Europe, where I suspect she will start an international incident that will bring about the end of the world. I also suspect that this incident will somehow originate with Kendra's very loud and distinctive laugh. This laugh will come soaring from miles away only to interrupt talks between world powers. Germany will believe that France is laughing at them, while Russia will accuse the U.S. Fisticuffs will break out and lead to the war to end all wars.
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
Today is the Yesterday of Tomorrow and the Day Before Yesterday of the Day After Tomorrow
Daulton hasn't hit puberty. He went to the doctor tonight to see if they can figure out why. I feel bad for the kid, but it gets awkward. He keeps asking me if he has dark hairs in his armpits.
Bobbie came by the office, wanting $11 more in quarters. She talked some nonsense for awhile and then left. I really need to bring a voice-recorder into the office, so I can remember these things.
Anna had to go practice with Chelsey this evening, for the Saturday night service thing they are doing now. Chelsey was a little late showing up, so we sat in the car for a bit in front of the church. While we were sitting there a teenage girl, accompanied by another girl, knocked on the car window and asked the time. We told her. About two minutes later, she came back and asked if she could borrow a phone to make a call to her mom. Anna quickly handed over her cell. I'm sure she thought something similar to what I did: "Oh, the poor girl is stuck here and needs a ride from her mother." That's not what the call was about. The girl just wanted to ask her mom if she could spend Saturday night with her "friend." The reason I put "friend" in quotes is that it turns out she didn't even know her "friend's" name. She had to ask her friend, in the middle of the conversation with her mother, what her name was. I'd have a conniption if I were her parent. We also learned from listening to her side of the conversation that this girl is having to take Saturday school. According to Anna, this means she's gotten herself into really big trouble. Someone isn't making good choices.
We brought Daisy along with us, to Anna's practice, so that we could then take her to the in-laws. Daisy likes playing with the other dogs. She and Hank play tug-o-war while Daisy stands on a pillow. This results in Hank pulling Daisy around the living room as she surfs the hardwood on a dog bed.
Well, we still need 11 wins. I guess I'll change my strategy. How about we get one win tomorrow and go from there?
Am I the only one who sees the Broncos getting destroyed on Sunday? Prove me wrong. Oh, please prove me wrong.
Anna's evil grandmother is seemingly coming to the Sunday night service so that she can make Anna's life miserable. The game will be on during the service. Something tells me, I'm going to have to go to church instead of watch football.
I'm hungry or thirsty. Or both.
Blue.
I'm watching the Dodgers-Cardinals right now. L.A. has the stupidest sound effects for when their players get a hit.
Now, I'm seeing a commercial for "AstroBoy." Could this look any more stupid?
Now, I'm seeing a commercial for this new Google MyTouch phone thing. These commercials make me want to shoot the actors, not buy the phone.
The air conditioner stopped working the other day. I called the heating and air conditioning people yesterday. They said they'd be here today. No one showed up.
I should take out Daisy again before we go to bed.
My left pec itches.
Howie and Chief love open windows. They definitely prefer it when the air isn't working.
People who read this blog: Andi
Andi is Hungarian. She's also awesome. She roomed with Anna during the first semester of that incredible D10 year. Andi is a fellow English major. Now, I was at first confused by this, wondering if that was like an American being a Spanish major. As it turns out, she's pretty much an English major like I'm an English major. Except, she typically talks more correctly than I do. Andi was also one of Anna's bridesmaids and has come to stay with us twice during the summer. Now she teaches English to high schoolers. She used to teach English to Hungarian officials. Apparently, they just wanted to know how to ask where the good clubs were. Andi spent a good deal of time in England a few years ago, and this has given her a very Anglicanized form of the English language. She likes to say "proper" far more often than we Americans might. Anna loves making Andi say things like "Hey, ya'll." In return, Andi trys to teach us some Hungarian. I'm pretty much stuck at being able to say "purple goose," "hedgehog cookie," and "urine." Andi claims to love my chili. I think she's just a nice person. Andi is an excellent swimmer. I mean excellent. Apparently, she could have been nationaly and internationally competitive if she had pursued it with the right coach. Instead she had injury and health problems and ended up focusing on school, studying abroahd and getting stuck with just being friends with some crazy Americans. I'm rather grateful for this.
Bobbie came by the office, wanting $11 more in quarters. She talked some nonsense for awhile and then left. I really need to bring a voice-recorder into the office, so I can remember these things.
Anna had to go practice with Chelsey this evening, for the Saturday night service thing they are doing now. Chelsey was a little late showing up, so we sat in the car for a bit in front of the church. While we were sitting there a teenage girl, accompanied by another girl, knocked on the car window and asked the time. We told her. About two minutes later, she came back and asked if she could borrow a phone to make a call to her mom. Anna quickly handed over her cell. I'm sure she thought something similar to what I did: "Oh, the poor girl is stuck here and needs a ride from her mother." That's not what the call was about. The girl just wanted to ask her mom if she could spend Saturday night with her "friend." The reason I put "friend" in quotes is that it turns out she didn't even know her "friend's" name. She had to ask her friend, in the middle of the conversation with her mother, what her name was. I'd have a conniption if I were her parent. We also learned from listening to her side of the conversation that this girl is having to take Saturday school. According to Anna, this means she's gotten herself into really big trouble. Someone isn't making good choices.
We brought Daisy along with us, to Anna's practice, so that we could then take her to the in-laws. Daisy likes playing with the other dogs. She and Hank play tug-o-war while Daisy stands on a pillow. This results in Hank pulling Daisy around the living room as she surfs the hardwood on a dog bed.
Well, we still need 11 wins. I guess I'll change my strategy. How about we get one win tomorrow and go from there?
Am I the only one who sees the Broncos getting destroyed on Sunday? Prove me wrong. Oh, please prove me wrong.
Anna's evil grandmother is seemingly coming to the Sunday night service so that she can make Anna's life miserable. The game will be on during the service. Something tells me, I'm going to have to go to church instead of watch football.
I'm hungry or thirsty. Or both.
Blue.
I'm watching the Dodgers-Cardinals right now. L.A. has the stupidest sound effects for when their players get a hit.
Now, I'm seeing a commercial for "AstroBoy." Could this look any more stupid?
Now, I'm seeing a commercial for this new Google MyTouch phone thing. These commercials make me want to shoot the actors, not buy the phone.
The air conditioner stopped working the other day. I called the heating and air conditioning people yesterday. They said they'd be here today. No one showed up.
I should take out Daisy again before we go to bed.
My left pec itches.
Howie and Chief love open windows. They definitely prefer it when the air isn't working.
People who read this blog: Andi
Andi is Hungarian. She's also awesome. She roomed with Anna during the first semester of that incredible D10 year. Andi is a fellow English major. Now, I was at first confused by this, wondering if that was like an American being a Spanish major. As it turns out, she's pretty much an English major like I'm an English major. Except, she typically talks more correctly than I do. Andi was also one of Anna's bridesmaids and has come to stay with us twice during the summer. Now she teaches English to high schoolers. She used to teach English to Hungarian officials. Apparently, they just wanted to know how to ask where the good clubs were. Andi spent a good deal of time in England a few years ago, and this has given her a very Anglicanized form of the English language. She likes to say "proper" far more often than we Americans might. Anna loves making Andi say things like "Hey, ya'll." In return, Andi trys to teach us some Hungarian. I'm pretty much stuck at being able to say "purple goose," "hedgehog cookie," and "urine." Andi claims to love my chili. I think she's just a nice person. Andi is an excellent swimmer. I mean excellent. Apparently, she could have been nationaly and internationally competitive if she had pursued it with the right coach. Instead she had injury and health problems and ended up focusing on school, studying abroahd and getting stuck with just being friends with some crazy Americans. I'm rather grateful for this.
History According to Daulton
I learned some stuff today. I would like to share this stuff with you.
Context: Yet another clue in yet another crossword puzzle. This one wanted the name of the person to surrender in 1865.
I figured that, even if Daulton can't pull this out of thin air, he must know the answer, and I can lead him to it. So I started by asking what war ended in 1865. I learned that the Vietnam war ended in 1865. When I expressed my doubts about this, I learned that WWII, WWI, and the American Revolution all ended in 1865. I happen to know that Daulton's grandfather was a Vietnam vet. So I asked Daulton how old he was when he died. Daulton didn't know. I reminded Daulton that 1865 was 144 years ago. Daulton quickly realized that his grandfather could not have been that old, but his response was not what I expected. Instead of deciding that 1865 did not mark the conclusion of the Vietnam war, he wanted to know what war his grandfather had fought in if it wasn't Vietnam. I decided it was time for a different approach. I asked Daulton who was the president in 1865. I learned that Obama, Bush, and Washington were all the president at that time. I pressed him a little more and finally elicited the name of what was apparently the only other president Daulton had ever heard of: Lincoln. So I asked Daulton what war might have been fought during Lincoln's presidency. Apparently Lincoln fought Hitler in WWI because Hitler wanted to kill the "negroes." It would seem that Abraham Lincoln also went by another name, "Lincoln Appleseed" because he chopped down an apple tree once, and he had wooden dentures. I explained to Daulton that I had always heard that George Washington had cut down the apple tree and had wooden teeth and that Johnny Appleseed had gone around planting apple trees, but of course, I admitted I could be wrong. I also figured I'd better let Daulton know that WWII, not WWI, was the one involving Hitler, and he wanted to kill the Jews. Daulton's response: Are you a Jew? When he found out I wasn't, he decided it was a good thing to kill all the Jews, except Jesus. I tried then to return Daulton to Lincoln and his war. I realized I wasn't getting anywhere, so I just told Daulton it was the Civil War. Daulton's reponse was essentially, "I heard of that once." I asked if he knew who it involved. Apparently the Civil War was about killing Indians. I couldn't take it anymore. I figured I'd just start telling Daulton what happened to see if there was any sort of recognition. Did he know anything about the North against the South? No. Did he know anything about secession? No. But he did know about one thing. He knew about slavery. He in fact is an expert on slavery. I had started to explain how the South had been mad at Lincoln about his abolishionist views, and Daulton quickly corrected me on my flawed perception of history. Did you know that people don't own people? Did you know that slaves were just voluntary workers? Did you know that slaves got paid to work in the fields? Did you know that, even though they were voluntary workers, they still ran away sometimes and that made it okay for the white people to beat those "boys?" I was incredulous. I asked Daulton more about this. He insisted that white people never owned black people. He knew this because his brother told him. He said his teacher had told him he was wrong, but he argued with him because his brother has told him all about it. And his brother is of course right due to his being older and bigger and cooler than Daulton. I never knew these things.
I know you guys think Daulton is kidding, but he's not. He's serious. He really believes this stuff. I remind you. He's fifteen, and he really believes this.
Jana, I came up with another reason there weren't as many births in August, as may have been expected. Who would have been celebrating Obama's election? Democrats. What do Democrats do? Murder babies. I'll bet a whole bunch of them got pregnant just so they could sacrifice their babies to Obama's name, but we don't hear about it because of the liberals that run the mainstream media.
And Jana, this doesn't even include the homosexual factor.
I went to Wal-Mart tonight. There was a boat/car in the parking lot. My lack of camera, plus the darkness, made it sadly impossible to take a picture for you, my faithful readers.
Happy birthday, Jana. We left you a voicemail, but apparently, you were too busy doing Democratic things to answer.
The playoffs start tomorrow. 11 wins. Oh, please, Oh, please. Give me 11 wins.
People who read this blog: Jo(h)n
John insists his name is spelled "Jon," but I know better. John likes rocks. He likes them a little too much. Perhaps that's why he's a geology major, working on his master's degree? John lived across the hall from the famed D10 apartment. Thus we got to know each other via our common D10 acquantainces. John is one of the nicest guys on earth. We still can't figure out why he was living with a womanizer like Bob and a Nazi like Mike. John likes cats. John likes the Yankees (the guy can't be perfect). Anna has a rock collection that John is dying to see. John once describe himself thusly, "I am a cranky, corrupt, busy, stereotyped, shy, sexy, radical, masculine, intelligent, frightening, creepy, idiotic, filthy, elitist, easy, distinguished, dirty, delightful, dead person." I think that sums John up pretty well.
Context: Yet another clue in yet another crossword puzzle. This one wanted the name of the person to surrender in 1865.
I figured that, even if Daulton can't pull this out of thin air, he must know the answer, and I can lead him to it. So I started by asking what war ended in 1865. I learned that the Vietnam war ended in 1865. When I expressed my doubts about this, I learned that WWII, WWI, and the American Revolution all ended in 1865. I happen to know that Daulton's grandfather was a Vietnam vet. So I asked Daulton how old he was when he died. Daulton didn't know. I reminded Daulton that 1865 was 144 years ago. Daulton quickly realized that his grandfather could not have been that old, but his response was not what I expected. Instead of deciding that 1865 did not mark the conclusion of the Vietnam war, he wanted to know what war his grandfather had fought in if it wasn't Vietnam. I decided it was time for a different approach. I asked Daulton who was the president in 1865. I learned that Obama, Bush, and Washington were all the president at that time. I pressed him a little more and finally elicited the name of what was apparently the only other president Daulton had ever heard of: Lincoln. So I asked Daulton what war might have been fought during Lincoln's presidency. Apparently Lincoln fought Hitler in WWI because Hitler wanted to kill the "negroes." It would seem that Abraham Lincoln also went by another name, "Lincoln Appleseed" because he chopped down an apple tree once, and he had wooden dentures. I explained to Daulton that I had always heard that George Washington had cut down the apple tree and had wooden teeth and that Johnny Appleseed had gone around planting apple trees, but of course, I admitted I could be wrong. I also figured I'd better let Daulton know that WWII, not WWI, was the one involving Hitler, and he wanted to kill the Jews. Daulton's response: Are you a Jew? When he found out I wasn't, he decided it was a good thing to kill all the Jews, except Jesus. I tried then to return Daulton to Lincoln and his war. I realized I wasn't getting anywhere, so I just told Daulton it was the Civil War. Daulton's reponse was essentially, "I heard of that once." I asked if he knew who it involved. Apparently the Civil War was about killing Indians. I couldn't take it anymore. I figured I'd just start telling Daulton what happened to see if there was any sort of recognition. Did he know anything about the North against the South? No. Did he know anything about secession? No. But he did know about one thing. He knew about slavery. He in fact is an expert on slavery. I had started to explain how the South had been mad at Lincoln about his abolishionist views, and Daulton quickly corrected me on my flawed perception of history. Did you know that people don't own people? Did you know that slaves were just voluntary workers? Did you know that slaves got paid to work in the fields? Did you know that, even though they were voluntary workers, they still ran away sometimes and that made it okay for the white people to beat those "boys?" I was incredulous. I asked Daulton more about this. He insisted that white people never owned black people. He knew this because his brother told him. He said his teacher had told him he was wrong, but he argued with him because his brother has told him all about it. And his brother is of course right due to his being older and bigger and cooler than Daulton. I never knew these things.
I know you guys think Daulton is kidding, but he's not. He's serious. He really believes this stuff. I remind you. He's fifteen, and he really believes this.
Jana, I came up with another reason there weren't as many births in August, as may have been expected. Who would have been celebrating Obama's election? Democrats. What do Democrats do? Murder babies. I'll bet a whole bunch of them got pregnant just so they could sacrifice their babies to Obama's name, but we don't hear about it because of the liberals that run the mainstream media.
And Jana, this doesn't even include the homosexual factor.
I went to Wal-Mart tonight. There was a boat/car in the parking lot. My lack of camera, plus the darkness, made it sadly impossible to take a picture for you, my faithful readers.
Happy birthday, Jana. We left you a voicemail, but apparently, you were too busy doing Democratic things to answer.
The playoffs start tomorrow. 11 wins. Oh, please, Oh, please. Give me 11 wins.
People who read this blog: Jo(h)n
John insists his name is spelled "Jon," but I know better. John likes rocks. He likes them a little too much. Perhaps that's why he's a geology major, working on his master's degree? John lived across the hall from the famed D10 apartment. Thus we got to know each other via our common D10 acquantainces. John is one of the nicest guys on earth. We still can't figure out why he was living with a womanizer like Bob and a Nazi like Mike. John likes cats. John likes the Yankees (the guy can't be perfect). Anna has a rock collection that John is dying to see. John once describe himself thusly, "I am a cranky, corrupt, busy, stereotyped, shy, sexy, radical, masculine, intelligent, frightening, creepy, idiotic, filthy, elitist, easy, distinguished, dirty, delightful, dead person." I think that sums John up pretty well.
Monday, October 5, 2009
Harvest Moon
Eleven wins. That's all it will take to win the World Series. We can do this. Right?
The moon is beautiful tonight.
It's ugly most other nights.
Bobbie wanted $20 more in quarters today. Then she started rambling on about a million things, including how her family once butchered ten 300lb pigs one year and how she worked with sexually abused children.
My back just popped. I originally typed "pooped" but decided I should probably go ahead and fix that.
Somehow Daulton and I got into a conversation about how God talks to people. I don't know what started Daulton off, but I do know that Daulton couldn't comprehend the idea that when Christians discuss God "talking" to them, they might not necessarily mean it as a literal, audible voice.
I went up to Greenwood tonight to stock up on Howie's cat food. Mostly, I just badly wanted Chick-fil-a and came up with the cat food excuse. I also stopped at Half-Priced Books. It was a good evening.
I still insist that the Broncos suck. They have simply exchanged a horrific defense for a horrific offense. It doesn't matter how good your defense is, if you can't score. Even the best defense will give up the occasional big play. That's all the Cowboys would have needed yesterday to win. If McDaniels can get the Broncos to something like 12-0, I might start to change my mind, but he needs to get his team into the endzone more often. They say that defense wins championships. Baloney. The Colts (for example) would still put up three touchdowns on the best defense ever, and an average defense (i.e. the Cowboys) will keep the Broncos below twenty points.
Anna's fingers are flying across the old ivory right now. Am I the only person who is sad that pianos are no longer made with genuine ivory?
I'm thirsty. I forgot to stick another pomegranate green tea in the refrigerator, so I don't have anything cold to drink. I might die.
On my way back from Greenwood, I stopped at Target to get Anna another pillow. She likes those memory foam things. The packages say that they last for years. They lie. Those things lose their squishy in just a few months.
I prefer the most extra firmestest pillows ever, and I stack one on top of the other. I think it's just because I have a huge head, and it weighs a lot.
This might also be why I have a huge neck that doesn't fit in normal dress shirts.
This does not explain my gigantic biceps.
Jana asked me a few days ago about why there might be a sudden rush of births in September. Apparently people predicted there would be a great number of births in August as a result of Obama's election, but this didn't happen. And now September is full of new babies. I propose that there are several reasons for this. First of all, I believe that people were so depressed about Obama being president that they stopped procreating, but of course, depression can work as a prophylactic only so long. I also believe that babies who were conceived by liberal minded parents, in celebration of the election, are by nature smarter than their parents and haven't yet had the chance to be ruined by liberal thinking. These babies, then, realized who their parents had elected and did their best to stay in the womb forever. Unfortunately for them, nature must still take its course. Jana, you also asked whether or not the Christmas holidays might have effected this. I say yes, they too played their part. As evidenced by the last election, this nation is full of godless liberals. These godless liberals desecrated the Christmas season with their filthy deeds, and the result is a new generation in the hands of the most evil and deluded of people, Democrats.
In all honesty Jana, people didn't have any money to do anything special this past holiday season, so they stayed home and entertained themselves the old-fashioned way.
I do love the Broncos orange home jerseys.
People who read this blog: Aimee
Aimee and I went to high school together. Aimee hates it when people pop their joints. She'll gladly stab you in the back with a pencil to keep from having to hear you pop your back. If Aimee and Anna had a "who can be more stubborn and work harder at something" contest, the universe would implode. Aimee is a fellow English major, though now I believe she is actually working on some sort of medical technician type schooling. I guess she decided she wanted to make money in her lifetime. Aimee is married to another English major. I believe they have a dog. Last time I saw her, she also had weird bubbly eyed goldfish. Aimee prefers manly men, which I believe is why her husband could probably pass for a mountain man pretty easily. I would never bet against Aimee in a fight, even if she is obviously undersized and outmatched. She's too mean, and I wouldn't put it past her to fight dirty. Aimee used to want to be the director of the CIA. Heck, she probably is the real director of the CIA. If she wants you dead, you're dead. Aimee was our high school valedictorian. She roared during her commencement address. I think she tends to scare people. Our lockers were arranged alphabetically in high school and our last names combined with a small school size put us very close together every year. Apparently, I used to scare her by punching lockers. Now we're friends. Go figure.
The moon is beautiful tonight.
It's ugly most other nights.
Bobbie wanted $20 more in quarters today. Then she started rambling on about a million things, including how her family once butchered ten 300lb pigs one year and how she worked with sexually abused children.
My back just popped. I originally typed "pooped" but decided I should probably go ahead and fix that.
Somehow Daulton and I got into a conversation about how God talks to people. I don't know what started Daulton off, but I do know that Daulton couldn't comprehend the idea that when Christians discuss God "talking" to them, they might not necessarily mean it as a literal, audible voice.
I went up to Greenwood tonight to stock up on Howie's cat food. Mostly, I just badly wanted Chick-fil-a and came up with the cat food excuse. I also stopped at Half-Priced Books. It was a good evening.
I still insist that the Broncos suck. They have simply exchanged a horrific defense for a horrific offense. It doesn't matter how good your defense is, if you can't score. Even the best defense will give up the occasional big play. That's all the Cowboys would have needed yesterday to win. If McDaniels can get the Broncos to something like 12-0, I might start to change my mind, but he needs to get his team into the endzone more often. They say that defense wins championships. Baloney. The Colts (for example) would still put up three touchdowns on the best defense ever, and an average defense (i.e. the Cowboys) will keep the Broncos below twenty points.
Anna's fingers are flying across the old ivory right now. Am I the only person who is sad that pianos are no longer made with genuine ivory?
I'm thirsty. I forgot to stick another pomegranate green tea in the refrigerator, so I don't have anything cold to drink. I might die.
On my way back from Greenwood, I stopped at Target to get Anna another pillow. She likes those memory foam things. The packages say that they last for years. They lie. Those things lose their squishy in just a few months.
I prefer the most extra firmestest pillows ever, and I stack one on top of the other. I think it's just because I have a huge head, and it weighs a lot.
This might also be why I have a huge neck that doesn't fit in normal dress shirts.
This does not explain my gigantic biceps.
Jana asked me a few days ago about why there might be a sudden rush of births in September. Apparently people predicted there would be a great number of births in August as a result of Obama's election, but this didn't happen. And now September is full of new babies. I propose that there are several reasons for this. First of all, I believe that people were so depressed about Obama being president that they stopped procreating, but of course, depression can work as a prophylactic only so long. I also believe that babies who were conceived by liberal minded parents, in celebration of the election, are by nature smarter than their parents and haven't yet had the chance to be ruined by liberal thinking. These babies, then, realized who their parents had elected and did their best to stay in the womb forever. Unfortunately for them, nature must still take its course. Jana, you also asked whether or not the Christmas holidays might have effected this. I say yes, they too played their part. As evidenced by the last election, this nation is full of godless liberals. These godless liberals desecrated the Christmas season with their filthy deeds, and the result is a new generation in the hands of the most evil and deluded of people, Democrats.
In all honesty Jana, people didn't have any money to do anything special this past holiday season, so they stayed home and entertained themselves the old-fashioned way.
I do love the Broncos orange home jerseys.
People who read this blog: Aimee
Aimee and I went to high school together. Aimee hates it when people pop their joints. She'll gladly stab you in the back with a pencil to keep from having to hear you pop your back. If Aimee and Anna had a "who can be more stubborn and work harder at something" contest, the universe would implode. Aimee is a fellow English major, though now I believe she is actually working on some sort of medical technician type schooling. I guess she decided she wanted to make money in her lifetime. Aimee is married to another English major. I believe they have a dog. Last time I saw her, she also had weird bubbly eyed goldfish. Aimee prefers manly men, which I believe is why her husband could probably pass for a mountain man pretty easily. I would never bet against Aimee in a fight, even if she is obviously undersized and outmatched. She's too mean, and I wouldn't put it past her to fight dirty. Aimee used to want to be the director of the CIA. Heck, she probably is the real director of the CIA. If she wants you dead, you're dead. Aimee was our high school valedictorian. She roared during her commencement address. I think she tends to scare people. Our lockers were arranged alphabetically in high school and our last names combined with a small school size put us very close together every year. Apparently, I used to scare her by punching lockers. Now we're friends. Go figure.
Saturday, October 3, 2009
My Fingers Are a Little Chilly
Daisy pooped some today. It was all outside.
Howie and Chief probably pooped some too. That, hopefully, was in the litter box.
Nothing much really happened today until Anna and I went to this Saturday night coffee house church service thing. Anna and her friend Chelsey led the music. Chelsey sings like a wild woman. Anna sings like a singer. They sound oddly good together. This was the first time this church had held this Saturday night service. The idea of the whole thing being that people should just come and hang out without feeling like they are in church. I'm not sure how it's going to work. Maybe people who don't normally go to church will show up, maybe they won't. We'll see what happens. The people were nice though.
After the service thingy, we stopped by Anna's parentals to see the new horse. Yes, they got a new horse. That makes three. The new one is mostly for Anna to ride. Her name is "Kansas." Though, that might change. Kansas was a little spirited tonight. Anna's dad will ride her for awhile before he lets Anna try. It worries me. I don't want Anna thrown. Anna does think the horse is pretty though.
While we were out with the horses, a group of people passed on a hay-ride. I've never understood hay-rides. They are about the least fun "fun" activity I have ever seen. You sit on uncomfortable and itchy seats while being jolted slowly through typically chilly evenings. I guess it's good for snuggling close to your sweetheart.
I don't know that we really did much else today.
Blue
People who read this blog: My dear mother-in-law
My mother in law is a lovely and hilarious lady, who will go out of her way to do anything for you. She came from a huge family and most of her siblings still live in the area. Her interests are Lifetime movies and her daughters. She is probably the funniest person on the planet. She tells fantastic Bible stories. Most of the time she is very hot and wants the air-conditioner on full blast. She says that Jack Daniels murdered someone and tried to bury him on their property. She loves to give hugs and will always make you feel welcome. People tend to dump their problems on her because she is an excellent listener. She's good with helping people out. She's also probably a little insane. Her favorite thing to say is, "How do I know these things?" This usually comes after she accidentally cusses at you in German.
Howie and Chief probably pooped some too. That, hopefully, was in the litter box.
Nothing much really happened today until Anna and I went to this Saturday night coffee house church service thing. Anna and her friend Chelsey led the music. Chelsey sings like a wild woman. Anna sings like a singer. They sound oddly good together. This was the first time this church had held this Saturday night service. The idea of the whole thing being that people should just come and hang out without feeling like they are in church. I'm not sure how it's going to work. Maybe people who don't normally go to church will show up, maybe they won't. We'll see what happens. The people were nice though.
After the service thingy, we stopped by Anna's parentals to see the new horse. Yes, they got a new horse. That makes three. The new one is mostly for Anna to ride. Her name is "Kansas." Though, that might change. Kansas was a little spirited tonight. Anna's dad will ride her for awhile before he lets Anna try. It worries me. I don't want Anna thrown. Anna does think the horse is pretty though.
While we were out with the horses, a group of people passed on a hay-ride. I've never understood hay-rides. They are about the least fun "fun" activity I have ever seen. You sit on uncomfortable and itchy seats while being jolted slowly through typically chilly evenings. I guess it's good for snuggling close to your sweetheart.
I don't know that we really did much else today.
Blue
People who read this blog: My dear mother-in-law
My mother in law is a lovely and hilarious lady, who will go out of her way to do anything for you. She came from a huge family and most of her siblings still live in the area. Her interests are Lifetime movies and her daughters. She is probably the funniest person on the planet. She tells fantastic Bible stories. Most of the time she is very hot and wants the air-conditioner on full blast. She says that Jack Daniels murdered someone and tried to bury him on their property. She loves to give hugs and will always make you feel welcome. People tend to dump their problems on her because she is an excellent listener. She's good with helping people out. She's also probably a little insane. Her favorite thing to say is, "How do I know these things?" This usually comes after she accidentally cusses at you in German.
I'm Not Racist
So I was working on a crossword with Daulton today, and one of the words turned out to be "sari." He had never heard of these. So I started to explain but was quickly stopped with this diatribe:
"I don't want to talk about it. I hate them. We gave them India. We gave the Jews Jerusalem and Germany. We gave the Europeans Europe. I hate them. I hate those wet-back Mexican ocean swimmers. I'm not racist. Black people are ok here, but no one else. We're giving them the U.S. I don't hate black people. The only Mexican people I love are the two in my family. I hate the rest. The only black person I love is my cousin Braden. I hate the rest. I'm not racist. My dad and I sit around at home and joke about the 'n' word. I wouldn't say it to their faces though or I'd get beat up. My dad once called a bunch of black guys the 'n' word, and they beat him up. I don't want to talk about it."
I'm not exaggerating. I'm not making this up. That's what he said as best as I can remember it. I doubt he realizes how little sense he even made. When I asked him more about it, he just said, "I don't want to talk about it."
Bobbie got $20 more in quarters today. She got $20 earlier this week. I have no idea what she does with these quarters.
I've been collecting a lot of rent checks the past couple days. Most everybody gets paid the third of the month, so I'll probably get the rest on Monday.
Camouflage Tazmanian Devil.
Jeremy's (Jana's foreigner terrorist husband) birthday was today. Anna and I called and wished him a happy birthday. Fortunately, I don't think we interrupted any special birthday loving. I guess that already happened (Blame Jeremy, Jana. He's the one who brought it up).
I'm thirsty.
I went to Wallyworld tonight. I got a whole ton of tea. None of it is cold yet. My life is ruined.
I can't wait until the Broncos pull out the AFL throwback uniforms. That'll be sweet. After they start losing, the throwback uniforms will pretty much be the only good thing about this season.
I'm following the Rockies-Dodgers game. There's all this discussion about whether or not the Rockies should try to win the division. Of course they should try. They need to stay in that winning mindset. Should they happen to lose tonight, then they can go ahead and rest players this weekend, but if they win, they need to keep trying to win.
I haven't heard anything about my grandmother today. She should be through with her surgery. I think my dad might fly out there later this week.
I just scratched my thigh on the baby-gate we have set up to keep Daisy out of the spare bedroom. I lead a terrible life.
There's an IHOP going in near Wal-Mart. This gives us an option besides Steak & Shake for late-night dining. There's another new restaurant going up near that Wal-Mart as well. There are no signs indicating what it might be. I'm hoping and praying and begging that it might magically be a Chick-Fil-A. I would kill for that.
My back is a little tight.
My butt is super tight. I should start a website in honor of this thing.
Anna and I gave Daisy a bath tonight. She now smells like thyme and rosemary again.
People who read this blog: Joel
Joel is the dashingly handsome, bespectacled fellow from our bridal party. He is remarkably hairy and enjoys combing his hair with his fingers. Joel and I lived together for our first three years at Calvin. We hardly talked freshman year. Joel likes playing computer games that involve building civilizations and declaring war. Joel hates it when you put a round trashcan in a corner. Joel is currently studying to be a lawyer at Wayne State. Joel enjoys rollerblading and tying one of each shoe he wore in his high school athletics career into a string of stinky. Joel sometimes thinks he's a ninja. He often wonders why the rum is gone. Mostly, Joel can be described as an international man of mystery.
"I don't want to talk about it. I hate them. We gave them India. We gave the Jews Jerusalem and Germany. We gave the Europeans Europe. I hate them. I hate those wet-back Mexican ocean swimmers. I'm not racist. Black people are ok here, but no one else. We're giving them the U.S. I don't hate black people. The only Mexican people I love are the two in my family. I hate the rest. The only black person I love is my cousin Braden. I hate the rest. I'm not racist. My dad and I sit around at home and joke about the 'n' word. I wouldn't say it to their faces though or I'd get beat up. My dad once called a bunch of black guys the 'n' word, and they beat him up. I don't want to talk about it."
I'm not exaggerating. I'm not making this up. That's what he said as best as I can remember it. I doubt he realizes how little sense he even made. When I asked him more about it, he just said, "I don't want to talk about it."
Bobbie got $20 more in quarters today. She got $20 earlier this week. I have no idea what she does with these quarters.
I've been collecting a lot of rent checks the past couple days. Most everybody gets paid the third of the month, so I'll probably get the rest on Monday.
Camouflage Tazmanian Devil.
Jeremy's (Jana's foreigner terrorist husband) birthday was today. Anna and I called and wished him a happy birthday. Fortunately, I don't think we interrupted any special birthday loving. I guess that already happened (Blame Jeremy, Jana. He's the one who brought it up).
I'm thirsty.
I went to Wallyworld tonight. I got a whole ton of tea. None of it is cold yet. My life is ruined.
I can't wait until the Broncos pull out the AFL throwback uniforms. That'll be sweet. After they start losing, the throwback uniforms will pretty much be the only good thing about this season.
I'm following the Rockies-Dodgers game. There's all this discussion about whether or not the Rockies should try to win the division. Of course they should try. They need to stay in that winning mindset. Should they happen to lose tonight, then they can go ahead and rest players this weekend, but if they win, they need to keep trying to win.
I haven't heard anything about my grandmother today. She should be through with her surgery. I think my dad might fly out there later this week.
I just scratched my thigh on the baby-gate we have set up to keep Daisy out of the spare bedroom. I lead a terrible life.
There's an IHOP going in near Wal-Mart. This gives us an option besides Steak & Shake for late-night dining. There's another new restaurant going up near that Wal-Mart as well. There are no signs indicating what it might be. I'm hoping and praying and begging that it might magically be a Chick-Fil-A. I would kill for that.
My back is a little tight.
My butt is super tight. I should start a website in honor of this thing.
Anna and I gave Daisy a bath tonight. She now smells like thyme and rosemary again.
People who read this blog: Joel
Joel is the dashingly handsome, bespectacled fellow from our bridal party. He is remarkably hairy and enjoys combing his hair with his fingers. Joel and I lived together for our first three years at Calvin. We hardly talked freshman year. Joel likes playing computer games that involve building civilizations and declaring war. Joel hates it when you put a round trashcan in a corner. Joel is currently studying to be a lawyer at Wayne State. Joel enjoys rollerblading and tying one of each shoe he wore in his high school athletics career into a string of stinky. Joel sometimes thinks he's a ninja. He often wonders why the rum is gone. Mostly, Joel can be described as an international man of mystery.
Thursday, October 1, 2009
Playoffs!
Playoffs!
Playoffs!
Playoffs!
Let's go ahead and just sweep L.A. and win the division. Wouldn't that be fun?
Yesterday was Daulton's birthday.
He told everybody yesterday that it was his birthday.
Bobbie gave him $5.
I didn't make him doing anything and let him call his aunt to pick him up early.
Today, he told everybody that his birthday had been yesterday and that he had received $165. Of course, they all asked what he was going to do with that money, which meant he told everyone that he was going to buy a go-cart.
I felt especially bad for Katie's daughter, who came by to pay her mom's rent. Daulton had this conversation with her:
"Yesterday was my birthday"
"Happy late birthday"
"I got $165"
"Wow, what are you going to do with that?"
"I'm going to buy a go-cart, but I won't show it to you or else you might buy it"
"I don't want a go-cart"
"Maybe you'll tell someone about it, and they will buy it"
*She laughs*
"Ok, I'll show you" *He proceeds to find the listing in the paper and then reads the entire listing to her, in his stumbling manner*
"That sounds like a good deal"
"I tried to call them, but they didn't answer. My mom used her phone to reverse dial the number and figured out their address. They live in hope. I'm going to go over there and get it before anyone else can buy it. Don't tell anybody about it."
Yeah, I felt bad for her. Most of the time I just want to tell Daulton to shut up.
Daulton also harrassed Mike for several minutes. Unfortunately, Daulton knows that Mike sells knives. So with this money burning a hole in his pocket, he wouldn't stop pestering Mike about any knives he might have for sale.
Yesterday, while I was in the office, Alice came by with a bunch of paperwork she wanted me to fax for her son, Tony. I'm not sure exactly what all the paperwork entailed, but it had to do with her son having failed to satisfy the government that he was making real efforts to find a job.
Today, I was in the office, and Alice brought by a resume for Tony, that she wanted me to copy.
Today, one of Alice's granddaughters came in and needed a copy of her birth certificate, her child's birth certificate, and her government issued i.d. I noted two things. She is 22 and doesn't have a drivers license. She also has a nearly eight year old daughter.
After I was done in the office, I decided that Anna and I should visit Mousillami's drive-in. Tomorrow is the last day that it is open for the season. We ate food. Food is tasty.
We took the Explorer in to Wayne's Automotive Electric yesterday. I got a call from them today that they were finished. We went and picked up the car.
After we picked up the car, we drove to the in-laws' house to give back the truck. There is this guy that sells flowers out of a white van sometimes, at the Highway 46/31 intersection. He has the most amazing roses. I stopped on my way to the in-laws and picked up some flowers for Anna and her mother. I got Anna a bouquet of a dozen red roses and a couple white daisies, and I got Anna's mother a bouquet of a dozen purple roses and a couple matching daisies.
Anna's parents are getting another horse this weekend for Anna to ride. In honor of this even, Anna and I went and got her some riding boots last night. She looks really cute in them.
While we were at the in-laws', I made sure I was following ESPN's "bottom line" so that I could see when the Rockies clinched a playoff birth. I'm so happy.
I also threw the frisbee for Hank for awhile. I threw one a little too hard, and my shoulder popped pretty violently. I stopped after that.
I found out tonight that my grandmother fell and broke her hip today. This doesn't at all surprise me, because she has always been extremely small and frail (she essentially starved herself her entire life and thus was strongly affected by osteoporosis). She also has Alzheimer's, and apparently that is getting pretty bad as well. They are doing hip replacement surgery tomorrow. At her age and with her physical condition, it's a risky proposition. Honestly, I don't really know her very well. I never saw her more than once a year, and I haven't seen her in four or five years. So I'm having a hard time figuring out my feelings, but what I am most worried about is my dad. He already lost his father. His mother can't have too much longer. I can't imagine what that must feel like for him.
Well on that sour note, here's another person who reads this blog.
A person who reads this blog: Jana (In case you are wondering, I'm going in order of frequency of visits. Don't anybody get offended by when I talk about you. If you want me to talk about you sooner, visit this blog more.)
Jana is a communist. She is also Dutch. She is a redheaded Dutch girl. I guess her hair matches her political leanings. She married a foreigner. He's from Malaysia. He's probably a terrorist, setting up a sleeper-cell. He figured the best disguise would be to go to a Christian school and marry a Dutch girl. Jana can sing. Jana and Anna became friends through their shared experience of music classes. It was Jana's friendship with Anna that got Anna connected with the D10 apartment of her junior year, and thus it was Anna's friendship with Jana that lead to Anna's friendships with Heather, Sara, Andi, Bob, John, Mike, and probably several other people that I'm forgetting. Jana has a basset hound named Charlie. Charlie is a deliberately naughty dog. Jana and her foreigner husband are at Fuller pursuing their MDivs because Jana is a liberal feminist communist heathen. They both like to lead church worship services in Satanic modern worship songs. Jana is a Packers fan. I just laugh at her when I think about Green Bay's last appearance in a Superbowl. Jana's wedding was in downtown Chicago. For the reception, they had genuine Chicago-style deep dish pizza. Pizza covers up a multitude of sins. I like Jana a lot (even if she did vote for the Beast that brings desolation).
Playoffs!
Playoffs!
Let's go ahead and just sweep L.A. and win the division. Wouldn't that be fun?
Yesterday was Daulton's birthday.
He told everybody yesterday that it was his birthday.
Bobbie gave him $5.
I didn't make him doing anything and let him call his aunt to pick him up early.
Today, he told everybody that his birthday had been yesterday and that he had received $165. Of course, they all asked what he was going to do with that money, which meant he told everyone that he was going to buy a go-cart.
I felt especially bad for Katie's daughter, who came by to pay her mom's rent. Daulton had this conversation with her:
"Yesterday was my birthday"
"Happy late birthday"
"I got $165"
"Wow, what are you going to do with that?"
"I'm going to buy a go-cart, but I won't show it to you or else you might buy it"
"I don't want a go-cart"
"Maybe you'll tell someone about it, and they will buy it"
*She laughs*
"Ok, I'll show you" *He proceeds to find the listing in the paper and then reads the entire listing to her, in his stumbling manner*
"That sounds like a good deal"
"I tried to call them, but they didn't answer. My mom used her phone to reverse dial the number and figured out their address. They live in hope. I'm going to go over there and get it before anyone else can buy it. Don't tell anybody about it."
Yeah, I felt bad for her. Most of the time I just want to tell Daulton to shut up.
Daulton also harrassed Mike for several minutes. Unfortunately, Daulton knows that Mike sells knives. So with this money burning a hole in his pocket, he wouldn't stop pestering Mike about any knives he might have for sale.
Yesterday, while I was in the office, Alice came by with a bunch of paperwork she wanted me to fax for her son, Tony. I'm not sure exactly what all the paperwork entailed, but it had to do with her son having failed to satisfy the government that he was making real efforts to find a job.
Today, I was in the office, and Alice brought by a resume for Tony, that she wanted me to copy.
Today, one of Alice's granddaughters came in and needed a copy of her birth certificate, her child's birth certificate, and her government issued i.d. I noted two things. She is 22 and doesn't have a drivers license. She also has a nearly eight year old daughter.
After I was done in the office, I decided that Anna and I should visit Mousillami's drive-in. Tomorrow is the last day that it is open for the season. We ate food. Food is tasty.
We took the Explorer in to Wayne's Automotive Electric yesterday. I got a call from them today that they were finished. We went and picked up the car.
After we picked up the car, we drove to the in-laws' house to give back the truck. There is this guy that sells flowers out of a white van sometimes, at the Highway 46/31 intersection. He has the most amazing roses. I stopped on my way to the in-laws and picked up some flowers for Anna and her mother. I got Anna a bouquet of a dozen red roses and a couple white daisies, and I got Anna's mother a bouquet of a dozen purple roses and a couple matching daisies.
Anna's parents are getting another horse this weekend for Anna to ride. In honor of this even, Anna and I went and got her some riding boots last night. She looks really cute in them.
While we were at the in-laws', I made sure I was following ESPN's "bottom line" so that I could see when the Rockies clinched a playoff birth. I'm so happy.
I also threw the frisbee for Hank for awhile. I threw one a little too hard, and my shoulder popped pretty violently. I stopped after that.
I found out tonight that my grandmother fell and broke her hip today. This doesn't at all surprise me, because she has always been extremely small and frail (she essentially starved herself her entire life and thus was strongly affected by osteoporosis). She also has Alzheimer's, and apparently that is getting pretty bad as well. They are doing hip replacement surgery tomorrow. At her age and with her physical condition, it's a risky proposition. Honestly, I don't really know her very well. I never saw her more than once a year, and I haven't seen her in four or five years. So I'm having a hard time figuring out my feelings, but what I am most worried about is my dad. He already lost his father. His mother can't have too much longer. I can't imagine what that must feel like for him.
Well on that sour note, here's another person who reads this blog.
A person who reads this blog: Jana (In case you are wondering, I'm going in order of frequency of visits. Don't anybody get offended by when I talk about you. If you want me to talk about you sooner, visit this blog more.)
Jana is a communist. She is also Dutch. She is a redheaded Dutch girl. I guess her hair matches her political leanings. She married a foreigner. He's from Malaysia. He's probably a terrorist, setting up a sleeper-cell. He figured the best disguise would be to go to a Christian school and marry a Dutch girl. Jana can sing. Jana and Anna became friends through their shared experience of music classes. It was Jana's friendship with Anna that got Anna connected with the D10 apartment of her junior year, and thus it was Anna's friendship with Jana that lead to Anna's friendships with Heather, Sara, Andi, Bob, John, Mike, and probably several other people that I'm forgetting. Jana has a basset hound named Charlie. Charlie is a deliberately naughty dog. Jana and her foreigner husband are at Fuller pursuing their MDivs because Jana is a liberal feminist communist heathen. They both like to lead church worship services in Satanic modern worship songs. Jana is a Packers fan. I just laugh at her when I think about Green Bay's last appearance in a Superbowl. Jana's wedding was in downtown Chicago. For the reception, they had genuine Chicago-style deep dish pizza. Pizza covers up a multitude of sins. I like Jana a lot (even if she did vote for the Beast that brings desolation).
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